


the in-between

by kuroopaisen



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: But nothing too dark, F!Reader - Freeform, F/M, Friends to Lovers, but what else is new, kind of, kuroo's a big dumb nerd, mostly just wholesome fluff, persona 5 spoilers (sort of?), reader is nekoma's manager, references to/depictions of anxiety & depression, slowburn, this is my first time posting on ao3 so i have No Idea how to use the tags, with a pocket or two of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:34:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 30,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24734734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuroopaisen/pseuds/kuroopaisen
Summary: it took you and kuroo far too long to learn that love was never singularly defined. it can be both striking and understated, sudden and unhurried, gentle and all-consuming. and most of all, it can be anything else in-between.
Relationships: Kuroo Tetsurou/Reader, Kuroo Tetsurou/You
Comments: 46
Kudos: 300





	1. part 1

“I’ll help you,” Kuroo sighed. “On one condition.”

The scant bit of confidence you’d worked up was starting to crumble. You clenched your fists, steeling yourself. At this point, you’re willing to do just about anything.

“Manage the volleyball team for a while.”

Your face fell. “What, really?”

“Mhm,” Kuroo nodded, still slouched over his desk.

“You’re kidding, right?”

He shook his head. “Nuh-uh.”

This wasn’t quite how you’d expected the situation to go. And quite frankly, you were just upset that you were even _in_ this situation in the first place. But, who wouldn’t be?

Begging Kuroo Tetsurou to help you with chemistry wasn’t a situation you’d envisioned yourself ending up in. But, something had to be done about those abysmal exam marks. Your grades in everything else were fine; good, even. Certainly high enough to earn you your spot in Class 5. But that chemistry grade was something to be concerned about. Your homeroom teacher had warned you as much on the very first day of the school year.

And for the handful of weeks since, you’d been driving yourself mad trying to think of a solution. Hard work had only gotten you so far, and none of your friends felt they were competent enough to tutor you. You needed help – desperately.

So there you stood, in front of the desk of a boy you’d never had a proper conversation with before, asking for his help – all while uncomfortably aware that this was cutting into his lunch break.

You hadn’t quite known what to expect from this interaction. You weren’t really friends, after all; you’d been vaguely aware of him over this past year and a bit, but knew little, if anything, about him. All you knew was that he was topping the grade when it came to chemistry, and therefore, turning to him in this time of need might help.

You hadn’t expected _this_ ultimatum.

“Why?”

It was a genuine question.

“Hm?”

“Why ask me to be your manager?” You asked, tilting your head at him. “I know nothing about volleyball.”

“You’ll learn.”

You frowned. “This is the only way you’ll tutor me?”

“It’s not the _only_ way,” Kuroo shrugged, raising an eyebrow at you. “But it’d certainly bump it up my priority list.”

The worst thing was that it didn’t even seem like he was trying to be a dick.

 _Right_ , you thought. _Pros and cons._

Cons: being a manager would eat up a _lot_ of your time. Presumably. Maybe. You didn’t have any real idea.

Also, it would mean spending a lot more time around sweaty boys. That sounded kind of gross.

And what time did practice finish? Walking home after sunset was always a little scary. Certainly scary enough to stoke a bit of anxiety. 

More importantly, it sounded like responsibility. Maybe you were overestimating just what being a manager _meant_ , but it sounded like there was plenty of stuff you could mess up. ****

Pros: it’d look really, really good on your college applications.

Just like a passing chemistry grade would. Which you weren’t going to get all on your own.

“It doesn’t have to be for long,” he offered, raising an eyebrow at you. “Just a couple of months. And I’ll be your resource to use as you please.”

You blinked at him, baffled at his choice of phrasing.

“How about you just drop by practice this afternoon?” He suggested, balancing his chin on his fist. “You can get a feel for it.”

You sighed.

“Alright.”

You were willing to do just about anything, after all.

✧ ✧ ✧

Teenage boys, no matter how polite or kind or accommodating, are always scary in packs.

That little revelation came to mind as you pressed yourself meekly against the wall of the gym, watching a gaggle of boys running back and forth, jumping and hitting and shouting. Part of you wanted to melt into the wall, hoping that none of these giants would pay you much attention. ****

You’re painfully aware of one of them staring at you; a first-year, judging by his use of honorifics. He’s tallish, but not enough to be scary, with close-cropped hair and grumpy eyebrows. There’s a certain intensity to him – he seemed like the sort of person with too much tenacity for his own good.

And yet, he seemed terrified of you. Was he the sort of boy who couldn’t talk to girls?

You smiled to yourself. Such dichotomy in one personality, huh?

There was another boy that caught your eye. A quiet one, with chin-length black hair who seemed to want to sink into the ground. He didn’t look like the sort of boy you’d expect to find on a high school sports team. He was a little shorter than everyone else – except for Yaku, who’d greeted you quite amiably when you’d first arrived. 

But Yaku seemed like he _wanted_ to be there. Like he enjoyed it. This kid? He looked like he just wanted to melt into the shadows. He always flinched whenever anyone called out to him. Hell, he seemed to flinch even when someone so much as _looked_ at him. Was he okay? Should you _ask_ if he’s okay? Should you point him out to Kuroo? But Kuroo had already spoken to him a few times…

Well, checking in with people’s well-being would be part of your job as a manager, right? It’d be your duty to make sure that the club members were doing okay. 

But practice was still going. You’d have to put a pin in that thought. ****

The third years were frightening, as expected. But, you felt as though your upperclassmen would always be somewhat scary. The captain had traded a handful of words with you – hellos, nice to meet yous, a what are you even doing here – but he hadn’t made any particular point to help you out.

That job was left to the coach, who, thankfully, seemed quite kind. You had said very little to him, but you could tell that he loved his job just from the serene smile that graced his face as he watched his team go at it. ****

Practice was over before you knew it. The sun was setting outside the windows, the sky blushing orange. You bit your lip. Maybe you’d be able to get home before it got too dark…

You sighed, turning your gaze back to the gym floor. Maybe you should try talking to one of the boys… Yaku had always been friendly. Maybe he’d tolerate a conversation with you? Oh, what about Kai? He’d been very quiet, but he seemed nice… There was Kuroo, too…

You pressed your lips together, eyes scanning over the gaggle of boys in front of you as your mind ran through the pros and cons all at once.

You frowned. The third years were yapping at that quiet boy; whatever they were saying, it didn’t seem exactly friendly. You froze. Should you do something? Was this normal? Was it a problem? He looked _terrified_ – not that he showed it outright, but it was in his eyes.

Kuroo was standing behind him, saying something to one of the third years. You couldn’t quite hear them, but Kuroo’s expression was… cold. Not confrontational, just unyielding. Whatever he’d said, the third years stalked away.

You watched closely as Kuroo’s expression softened as he looked at the shorter boy. He looked _concerned_. Were they friends?

“Oi, manager chick!”

You cringed. It’s one of the third years – not the captain, but someone you’d noted had quite the nasty serve.

“Help clean up!”

“Right!” You gave a quick half-bow, your head flicking around almost frantically as you looked for something to do. 

You settled for collecting stray balls, rushing them back to the ball bins. All the while you watched the sky darken beyond the gym windows – and with it, your anxiety began to blossom.

By the time you were picking up your bag to go home, the sky was positively black. You bit your lip as you stared out the gym windows, your eyebrows a little furrowed. ****

“Hey.”

You looked up, a little startled. Kuroo, forehead slick with sweat and cheeks tinged red from exertion. You resisted the urge to scrunch up your nose. Being this close to a sweaty teenage boy wasn’t high on your priorities list.

“What’d you think?” He asked, rubbing the back of his neck with a towel.

You shrugged. “Seems intense.”

“But you don’t hate it, right?” He smiled. It’s hopeful. Almost pitifully so.

You bit the inside of your cheek. In truth, you didn’t. There’s something quite fun about watching them play volleyball up close. They all got _so_ into it. It was always nice, watching people care about something so deeply that enjoyment seeped through every part of their being.

“We’ll see,” you said. “Maybe I’ll come back tomorrow.”

He smiled brightly at that half-promise. Brightly enough that you knew you didn’t want to let him down.

This side of him was already a far cry from that trickster-like figure you’d negotiated with this morning.

“Hey, uh…” He cleared his throat, one hand finding its way to the back of his head. “I was wondering… did you need me to walk you home? I know it’s getting kind of late, so…”

You felt something that’s not quite elation, but certainly a bit more intense than relief. Tokyo’s a safe enough place, yes, but that fact’s never enough to quell the anxiety you’d always felt from walking home in the dark.

“If it’s not too much trouble.” You tried to make your smile look relaxed and natural, but you knew some hint of tension had made its way in there.

“Cool,” Kuroo said, giving you a little nod as his eyes scanned your face. He relaxed his shoulders a bit, slouching down a little. Was he… trying to make himself smaller? “But, uh… where do you live?”

By some miracle, it’s not all that far from his place. You caught the relief on his face, even if he made an effort to hide it. Would he really have walked you all the way to your house, even if it wasn’t in the same area?

He didn’t give you time to think about it, turning around and waving a hand in the air.

“Hey, Kenma!”

Your brows rose instinctively as the shy kid scurried over, head hunched down and hands stuffed into his pockets.

“This is Kenma,” Kuroo smiled, nodding at him. “He’s my next-door neighbour.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” you smiled, tilting your head at him.

“Yeah,” Kenma nodded in a quiet response, not quite able to meet your eyes. You didn’t press it. You offered him your name quickly, a bit like an afterthought, but Kenma gave you a little nod in recognition.

“You guys ready to go?” Kuroo looked between the both of you, tilting his head at the door.

You glanced over at Kenma. He didn’t glance back.

“Yeah,” you nodded, relieved that you wouldn’t have to walk the dark streets on your own. ****

✉

 _[YOU] 7:21 PM_ : hello! Is this kuroo?

 _[Kuroo] 7:34 PM_ : you got it

 _[YOU] 7:36 PM_ : thank goodness! I just wanted to say, thank you for walking me home today. I was a bit worried about it, but I didn’t want to impose

 _[Kuroo] 7:38 PM_ : not a problem. I’m more than happy to do it again tomorrow

 _[Kuroo] 7:38 PM_ : since you are coming to practice, right?

 _[YOU] 7:40 PM_ : Sure :)

✧ ✧ ✧

Kuroo Tetsurou hadn’t been what you’d expected.

For one thing, he’d actually made good on your deal. You’d half-expected him to bail on tutoring you – though you couldn’t exactly say why. But, you supposed it would be hard for him to dodge the ire of his club manager. Regardless, he dedicated most afternoons to helping you study.

You’d meet up in the library before practice and you’d always start with chemistry. He was actually kind of good at explaining the concepts to you in a way you understood, without all the bells and whistles. He had a way of simplifying the concepts to their bare bones. That’s not to say that it wasn’t difficult; you still felt like you’d been left far, far behind. But, Kuroo was something of a comfort.

Somehow, you’d end up working on other subjects. Apparently, Kuroo’s surprisingly bad at literature. He was doing well enough, but it was something he just couldn’t wrap his head around. Maybe you’d been a bit gung-ho about offering your help, but you were just glad you finally had something to offer in this arrangement. Even though you were still managing the volleyball team, overwhelming as that could be sometimes.

But, you’d made a deal, and the whole manager business was less scary than you’d first thought. And you felt that with time, you’d get the hang of it. Maybe.

More often than not, your study session before practice wasn’t enough time to cover all the content you needed. So, sometimes, you’d continue it after practice, holed up in the library until you got kicked out. Kenma usually stuck with you guys, sitting in the corner with whatever game console he’d brought that day.

And without fail, Kuroo walked you all the way to your house every night. And during those walks, you talked. Rather animatedly. ****

“What I’m saying is that the divide between the arts and the sciences is arbitrary,” Kuroo shrugged, raising an eyebrow. “When they work together, incredible things happen. Genuine _art_ happens.” He cocked his head at you, that perceptive grin of his spread across his face. “You’d really disagree with me on that?”

“I didn’t say I _disagree_ ,” you grinned. “I’m just _surprised_ that you’re not one of those sciencey people who thinks that the arts are worthless.”

He scoffed at that, shaking his head. “Excuse _you_. I’ve got more nuance than _that_.”

“Sorry for doubting you,” you giggled.

“You better be.”

The thing you’d been most surprised about, above everything else, was just how enjoyable it was to talk to him. How easy it was to get lost in a conversation that most of your other friends might get bored by. It’s not that your other friends treated you _badly_ , but Kuroo had a way of naturally drawing out your thoughts, and he usually treated them with enough respect to engage with them. Of course, there were times when he loved to tease, and you’d learnt to not take it too personally.

Kuroo Tetsurou was far more interesting than you’d first given him credit for. And you felt kind of bad for that. You’d known he wasn’t just some dumb jock – he wasn’t topping chemistry for nothing – but you hadn’t expected him to be so… clever. So playful. So fun to talk to.

You were beginning to feel that maybe, just maybe, he was someone you could end up being quite close to.

✉

[ _YOU] 10:41 PM_ : hey, kuroo?

 _[Kuroo] 10:46 PM_ : what’s up?

 _[YOU] 10:47 PM_ : i was just wondering, why did you ask me to become manager?

 _[Kuroo] 10:48 PM_ : oh ahaha

 _[Kuroo] 10:48 PM_ : i thought having an extra pair of hands around would help the coach out a bit

 _[YOU] 10:48 PM_ : wait really

 _[YOU] 10:48 PM_ : that’s it?

 _[Kuroo] 10:50 PM_ : ??????

 _[YOU] 10:51 PM_ : you were so seedy about it!

 _[Kuroo] 10:51 PM_ : was i?

 _[YOU] 10:52 PM_ : i–

 _[Kuroo] 10:53 PM_ : :)

✧ ✧ ✧

“Kenma wants to quit.”

Your head shot up, turning to Kuroo with wide eyes. “What?”

“Yeah,” he sighed, one hand raking through his hair. “The third years have been giving him a really rough time.” He bit his lip, glancing at you. “You’ve seen it yourself.”

You swallowed. “I hoped I was just being too sensitive, but…”

Kuroo groaned, running a hand down his face. “They’re such _assholes_.”

You bit the inside of your cheek, unsure of what to say. The third years had almost made _you_ want to quit in the early days. They were scary, sharp, unrelenting. But they’d left you alone pretty quickly once you’d settled into the thrum of your responsibilities.

Kenma hadn’t been so lucky.

“Is he okay?” You murmured, brows knitted together. “I mean, I know he’s getting picked on, but is he… is he… I don’t know…”

“I get it,” Kuroo sighed. “Honestly, I don’t know. He doesn’t really talk about that sort of stuff.”

You set your pen down on the dining table, shifting in your chair to face him directly.

Practice had been cancelled for the afternoon, and Kuroo had bustled you out of school before you even had a chance to ask why. You’d been surprised when he had asked if the two of you could study at your place that afternoon – and some part of you had dreaded what your parents might say about you bringing a _boy_ home – but you’d conceded. He’d seemed stuck in his head; something not unusual for him, but he’d been just withdrawn enough to pique your concern.

This must’ve been why.

“I just don’t know what to do,” he mumbled, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms. “I don’t want to push him too hard or anything, but I don’t think he’s making the right choice.”

You bit your lip.

“Why?” You asked, feeling bold.

“Huh?”

“Tell me why you don’t want him to quit,” you said. “Other than the obvious.” You sat up a little straighter, grabbing your notebook and picking up your pen. “We can brainstorm together.”

“Other than the obvious?” He tilted his head at you.

“You know,” you shrugged. “I know you want him to stay around because he’s your best friend, but… there’s more to it, right?”

“Well…” Kuroo swallowed, rubbing the back of his neck as he leant back in his chair. “We’re not gonna get very far without him.”

You scribbled that down quickly. “Why’s that?”

“He’s a good strategist,” Kuroo said carefully, “And he’s great at running through all the potential outcomes on the spot. And nobody on the team’s as observant as he is.”

You bit the inside of your cheek as you transcribed. You weren’t narcissistic enough to think you knew Kenma better than Kuroo did. Nor did you want to presume you were closer to the second-year than you actually were. But you wanted to help.

“Why don’t you… explain that to him?” You asked, peering down at your notebook.

“What do you mean?”

“Like… just tell him the logical reasons you want him to stick around,” you shrugged. “I think he’d respond well to that.”

“I guess…” Kuroo pursed his lips, looking at you with a frown.

“What I’m trying to say is that… maybe putting it into terms that’ll resonate with him is the best way to go.” You weren’t quite sure if your point was getting across. You just had to hope that he understood.

“I get you,” he nodded, crossing his arms. “I dunno if it’ll work though.”

“He’ll listen to you,” you mused, propping your hand on your chin. 

“Huh?”

“It’s obvious you mean a lot to him,” you shrugged. “Even if he doesn’t really use his words to express that.”

Kuroo blinked at you, a touch of pink to his cheeks.

“I mean, he’s stuck it out with volleyball this long, hasn’t he?” You smiled at him, watching his cheeks grow even pinker. “That’s because of you.”

He cleared his throat as he looked down at his lap. It was strange to see him so… speechless. He was the sort of person that _always_ had a comeback. You were never able to get a one up on him. Sincerity, however, seemed to be his hamartia. ****

“I just… I wanna go as far as I can with this team,” he admitted, scratching the back of his neck. “You know, me and the other second years… when we first joined the team, we were asked about our goals.”

He sighed, looking up at the ceiling. “We all said that we wanted to win nationals.”

He wasn’t quite sure why he was telling you all this. He didn’t know where it came from. But he knew he’s grateful to be able to just _talk_. To share this with someone.

“Yaku and I used to fight all the time,” he smiled sheepishly, casting his gaze at you.

“I can see that,” you giggled. There was always a little fire between the two of them; it’d given you a good laugh many times.

“It was kind of stupid, but… we got over it. We learned to work together,” Kuroo sighed.

“I feel bad for poor Kai,” you smiled.

Kuroo laughed. “Yeah…” He sighed as he leaned over the table, resting his chin on his folded arms. “Nekoma used to be hot shit, you know.”

“Did we?” You asked.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Made it to nationals a couple of times. But, we sort of… fell off. We haven’t been as good as we could be for a while. And… I want to change that.”

He pressed his lips together, his brows furrowing. “We can’t do that if we don’t work together. And I know that sounds obvious, but… we need to focus on our teamwork more. We’ll only be great if we all learn to rely on and trust each other. We’ve gotta make the best use of all our strengths while covering our weaknesses.”

You nodded, making a little noise of agreement. You couldn’t help but smile as you listened to him. This side of Kuroo – this genuine, honest one – was quickly becoming your favourite. 

“Sorry,” he chuckled, sitting up straight. “Didn’t mean to ramble at you there.”

“No, no, it’s fine!” You shook your head. “Ramble all you’d like.”

He quirked an eyebrow at you for that, but he was smiling.

“Hey, Kuroo?” Normally, you wouldn’t have thought to ask the questions that were currently poking at the back of your mind. But he’d just been so honest, so open with you in a way he’d never been before. Maybe it was okay to be a little bit curious. Just this once. ****

“Hm?”

“I have a genuine question,” you said, folding your hands in your lap.

He looked at you, pouting a little.

“Why volleyball?”

He bit the inside of his cheek, brow creased ever so slightly. Usually, he’d just dodge a conversation like this; not because he was particularly embarrassed by it or anything like that, but because he didn’t want to talk about himself too much. He didn’t want to be rude and dominate the conversation.

But, you were asking. And, you seemed genuinely interested.

A little bit of sincerity wouldn’t hurt, right?

“My family moved here when I was pretty young,” he said, shrugging. “And I didn’t really… know how to make friends. Before I moved, I’d been part of a volleyball team. All my friends were on it, and… I had to move away from them.”

It was a little strange, trying to pull up all these memories. And trying to condense them was harder than he’d expected. “When I first met Kenma, we just played video games. I didn’t really… know how to talk to him. But he agreed to play volleyball with me, and that made things so much easier. I had something to _talk_ about.”

You smiled to yourself, the image of a shy little Kuroo more endearing than it should be.

“I even convinced him to go to a weekend class with me,” he smiled, looking down. “You know, I even remember when I first met Coach Nekomata.”

“Huh?” You frowned.

“The old coach who used to work here. Rumour is he’ll come out of retirement sometime soon,” he smiled. 

You nodded, even though you didn’t quite understand. 

We bumped into him at one of those classes,” Kuroo said. “He told me, ‘do what you love, and success will come.’ I still think about that.”

 _Do what you love, and success will come_. Yeah, that definitely sounded like something that’d resonate with Kuroo.

“Anyway, I joined the team in middle school, and that made it a lot easier to make friends,” Kuroo shrugged. “I don’t know. I love volleyball. Have for as long as I can remember. It’s fun. And… it helped me connect with people, even when… even when I couldn’t find the right words.”

He looked at you, a bit more tentative than usual. But, you were smiling, your chin propped up on one of your palms as you listened to him talk.

“Believe it or not, but I was a _really_ shy kid.” He didn’t know why he’s still talking. And honestly, he’s a little embarrassed by it. But, you’re still listening. And for that, he’s grateful.

“That doesn’t surprise me,” you grinned.

His eyes widened a little. “Huh?”

“You think so much,” you mused, looking upwards. “But, like… in the way introverts do, you know?” You blushed, looking down at your hands. “Well, I mean… I tend to overthink everything I say, right?”

“No, _really_?” Kuroo gasped, covering his mouth with one hand.

“Shush,” you shot him a half-glare, suppressing the urge to stick your tongue out at him like a child. “It’s just that… I see a little bit of that in you, too. Not… massively, but it’s there.” 

You couldn’t quite read his expression. It wasn’t one you’d seen before. And honestly, he wouldn’t know how to describe it himself. He was caught between the relief at being _seen_ , at being _understood_ , and the embarrassment of being called out. People didn’t tend to pick up on that part of him – and yet, you had.

He wasn’t used to being the one getting read.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, “I really didn’t mean to ramble so much.”

“Oi,” you giggled, “I said it’s fine, didn’t I?”

He raised an eyebrow at you.

“It’s nice that you care so much about the game.” You were smiling at him. Nothing unusual. But the look in your eyes was so genuine, so bright that he could feel his face burning up from looking at it.

“Yeah,” he smiled, breaking eye contact with you. God, he really didn’t know what to do in conversations like these. “Anyway, should we get back to chem?”

✉

[ _closet introvert] 9:22 PM_ : so

 _[YOU] 9:25 PM_ : so

 _[closet introvert] 9:25 PM_ : i think i’m gonna try to talk to kenma after school tomorrow ****

✧ ✧ ✧

If there was one thing you were fairly decent at as manager, it was looking after the first and second years. Bit by bit, you’d worked up an adequate rapport with each of them, and you had most of their personalities sorted out. Most importantly, you knew what to do when they were down.

You just had to let Yaku rant – let him shout and gripe and swear, and he’d be okay. Kai liked a constructive conversation, had in soft, measured tones, and offering a solution or two. Yamamoto wanted fire and conviction, a challenge to do better, to _be_ better. Fukunaga liked a distraction, something to take his mind off of whatever was bothering him. Kenma liked to be left alone to sort things out for himself – but you were permitted to make him a care package or two.

You’d known Kuroo long enough by now to know that he was rather reticent when it came to his own feelings. He wasn’t the sort to talk about them upfront; you had to peer at the silences and the spaces between his words to find out what he really meant. You had to look at his behaviour; he was never too straightforward. That sort of thing seemed to overwhelm him.

That presented a bit of a problem. If he didn’t want to talk about his feelings, he simply wouldn’t. He’d deflect the conversation, or downplay how he was feeling. Sometimes he gave you bits and pieces, but he rarely spilled his true thoughts and feelings. They were exceedingly difficult to draw out of him – he had to offer them up himself. And most of the time, he bounced back pretty quickly from his more melancholic moods on his own. 

But not today.

Kuroo wasn’t exactly loud. At least, not in the same way Yamamoto was – or that rambunctious wing spiker from Fukurodani. It was well within Kuroo’s abilities to be obnoxious, but he wasn’t _loud_. But even for him, he was being uncharacteristically quiet today.

Practice had gone fine, as far as you could tell. Nothing had gone obviously wrong, and nobody had gotten injured. From your perspective, things had even gone _well_. Admittedly, your knowledge of volleyball didn’t run particularly deep just yet, but you were trying your best.

Kuroo was usually so _bright_ after practice, always grinning or cackling at something despite his exhaustion. Half the time he’d point things out to you, explaining certain moves they’d practised or formations they were trying out.

But today, he’d just picked up his bag dourly, waiting at the door for you and Kenma to leave. He’d said very little on the walk to the train station when usually he’d be rambling about something or other. You and Kenma exchanged a look; he was just as concerned as you were.

And just like you, he didn’t know how to breach the conversation. ****

“So… how do they even work?” You asked, blinking down at Kenma’s DS screen.

You couldn’t stand the silence for much longer. And you knew that a sure-fire way to get Kenma talking was by asking him about video games – especially optimization.

“EVs are gained by defeating specific Pokemon,” Kenma murmured. “If you defeat a Pokemon with naturally high HP like Chansey, you’ll gain EVs towards your own HP. However, you can only gain 252 EV’s towards any one stat.”

You nodded, opting to let him ramble. Usually, Kuroo would’ve led the conversation between the three of you. But, you’d valiantly taken that task up yourself today – and the easiest way to help things go smoothly was to get Kenma on a roll.

“You can gain a maximum of five-hundred and twelve total, so realistically you can only optimise two stats at a time,” he continued, eyes still glued to his screen. You took a moment to glance at Kuroo. He was staring out the window of the train, his expression worryingly forlorn. Was he even listening?

“IVs are a Pokemon’s innate capabilities.” Kenma was still going. You made an affirmative noise in the back of your throat, nodding. “A Pokemon with a high attack IV will have a naturally higher attack stat than a Pokemon with a low attack IV, even at the same level.”

On the one hand, it was nice to know that Kenma was comfortable enough with you to ramble like this. It was also nice to see Kenma talking freely; a rare and precious sight.

On the other hand, it just made you _more_ stressed about Kuroo. He hadn’t breathed a _word_ the entire ride. He hadn’t even taken a moment to gaze fondly at Kenma while he was rambling. And he _always_ did that when Kenma was on a roll.

You managed to ask enough questions to fill the distance to Kenma’s house. He was speaking more than usual. That much was obvious, yes – but even for a Kenma that was geeking out, this was unusual.

And with the way his gaze kept flicking to Kuroo, you knew it was because he was truly, deeply concerned.

Kuroo still made somewhat of an effort to say goodbye to Kenma, despite his mood. The usual “make sure you don’t go to sleep too late, okay?” and “make sure you drink enough water, so you don’t get a headache.”

But before Kenma walked through his front door, he looked at you. And when you looked back, he held eye contact. Then he looked very pointedly at Kuroo, who was staring up at the sky. By the time you turned to look at Kenma again, he was already scurrying through his front door.

“You ready?” Kuroo asked, now looking at you.

You nodded, half-jogging to join him on the street. Even today, even when it seemed like he just wanted to go home and sleep, he was still walking you home. Sure, your house wasn’t all that far from his, but he still went out of his way every night, just to make sure you felt comfortable.

That quiet thoughtfulness was part of who he was. You’d seen him direct it at Kenma all the time.

The same Kenma who’d just sent you a silent plea.

The Kenma, who never looked you in the eyes for longer than half a second.

The Kenma, who had just asked you to speak to his best friend.

That was all the push you needed. ****

“Hey, Kuroo?” You murmured.

“Hm?”

“Are you okay?” You asked.

Kuroo looked at you, one eyebrow raised. He was torn.

Should he really burden you with this? Was it right for him to worry you _again_?

But you’re looking at him with such genuine concern, such genuine _care._ And the advice you’d given him when he was worried about Kenma had been both helpful and effective. And surely, you wouldn’t have asked that question if you didn’t want a proper answer, right?

 _Fuck it_ , he thought.

“I feel like I’m not measuring up,” he sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets. “My blocking hasn’t been improving. And I don’t know why. I’ve been trying to work on my read blocking but I just can’t get it down. I can’t even fix the problem because I don’t know what the problem _is_.”

He took a deep breath, his steps slowing to a stop. “I convinced Kenma to stay on, but I’m not a team-mate he can be proud of.”

“Kuroo…”

You looked at him, cloaked in the shadows of the street. His gaze was cast at the ground, his brow furrowed and the smallest of pouts on his lips. You wanted to hug him, but you weren’t sure if that’d help.

You didn’t quite know what to say. You knew what it was like to get caught up in your own insecurities – you were sure most people did. You knew he couldn’t see himself the way you saw him; tenacious, hard-working, passionate.

“You’re being too hard on yourself,” you murmured. No, that was too soft – too wishy-washy. “I know that it… seems kind of silly for me to say, but you _are_.”

You clenched your fists to steel yourself, taking a step closer to him. That got his attention – he looked up at you, eyes slightly wide.

“You feel like you’re not measuring up, or that you’re not improving… but I don’t see it that way.” It was true. You watched him push himself harder each and every day, improving little by little. And when he wasn’t, he’d learn from those mistakes.

“It must be easy to lose yourself on the court, but from where I’m standing… you’re improving every day.” Your eyes searched his face, looking for any indication that your words were having some kind of impact.

“And… you don’t need to be the world’s best middle blocker, you know?” You said, tilting your head at him. “You’re _good_ , Kuroo. And you know you’ve got space to improve – that’s your strength. That makes you a team-mate worth being proud of.”

He was staring at you, eyes still wide. The dim light of the street hid the blush on his cheeks. For that, he was thankful.

“Uh…” He felt like he should say something. But he didn’t quite know what. ‘Thank you’ would’ve been the natural response, but those words just wouldn’t come.

“Sorry,” you blushed, your nerves finally catching up with you as you looked away from him. “I didn’t mean to… push your boundaries or anything like that, but… if you need someone to talk to, I’m here.”

Had you overstepped his boundaries? Had you made him uncomfortable? Those questions plagued you for the rest of the way home, Kuroo still quiet and reticent at your side.

You hadn’t overstepped his boundaries at all. Kuroo just couldn’t find the right words, even as you closed the distance to your house.

In all honesty, he’s touched. Touched that you cared so much. Touched that you reached out, even though he could tell how nervous you were. Touched that you were paying that much attention.

As he walked through the door of his own home, he couldn’t get the image of you looking up at him so resolutely out of his head.

He’d have to thank some deity above for the fact you were bad at chemistry, wouldn’t he? 

✉

 _[japan’s okayest tutor] 10:57 PM_ : hey so uh

 _[japan’s okayest tutor] 10:57 PM_ : i just wanted to say thanks

 _[japan’s okayest tutor] 10:58 PM_ : for listening to me be all emotional like that

 _[japan’s okayest tutor] 10:58 PM_ : i put a lot on you but you were really nice about it

 _[japan’s okayest tutor] 10:59 PM_ : so yeah

 _[japan’s okayest tutor] 10:59 PM_ : thanks

 _[YOU] 10:59 PM_ : NO! DON’T APOLOGISE!

 _[japan’s okayest tutor] 10:59 PM_ : !?!?!?!

 _[YOU] 11:00 PM_ : honestly, i don’t mind! and i’m happy to listen :(

 _[YOU] 11:00 PM_ : i’m here if you need to talk to anyone, okay?

 _[japan’s okayest tutor] 11:04 PM_ : you too

✧ ✧ ✧

You were alone.

Your sobs were the only sound fracturing the fragile silence of the empty gym as you slumped against the wall, your knees brought up to your chest.

Why did you have to fuck up _so_ bad? You’d managed to survive your first year with no drama, the only cause of concern being your studies. They were overwhelming enough to deal with on their own. You’d certainly felt down about your grades and whatnot before, but those ruts were a little easier to pull yourself out of. ‘They’re just grades,’ you’d try and tell yourself. ‘You can improve next time. And they don’t define you as a person.’ Even if you didn’t quite believe any of that, it was nice to have some rhetoric to at least attempt to counteract those thoughts.

But now? Now you truly felt _alone_. Like no-one cared about you.

You felt like you _deserved_ it. Like anyone who cared about you was wasting their time. Like you were taking up their time and attention undeservedly.

It was all too overwhelming.

The pain choked you. Every thought, every feeling you’d been trying to fend off for so long ripped through you like an arrow.

Fuck, why couldn’t you just hold yourself together? Why did you have to be so _weak_?

You let go. And you cried. And cried. And cried.

The sound shattered the vacuous silence of the gym. You weren’t sure how long you’d been sitting there, letting your sobs rack through your body.

Your throat was sore.

Your eyes stung.

You were alone.

And you deserved it. ****

“Woah.”

You froze. You knew that voice.

“Hey.” Kuroo knelt in front of you, his hands finding their way to your forearms. “Hey, what’s wrong?” He was knelt in front of you, eyebrows knitted together as his eyes roamed your face.

You shook your head, squeezing your eyes shut. Shit, why was he here? Why hadn’t he just headed home?

You didn’t want anyone to see you like this. You didn’t want to worry them.

Kuroo’s arms found their way around you, coaxing you gently towards his chest. You collapsed into him, burying your face in his chest.

 _Fuck_ , that didn’t help at all. Your sobs came with more voracity, rawer and harsher than they had been.

He just held you, chin propped on your head and one hand rubbing your back. He didn’t say anything; he knew you didn’t need that right now. He knew that in moments like this, it was nice just to be held. To feel like someone’s there. ****

And then slowly, breath by breath, everything seemed to calm. Your sobs grew softer and softer against his chest, his gentle hums setting a new rhythm for your fractured mind. He was grounding you; each touch, each sound was an attempt to bring you back down to earth. You could tell it wasn’t the most comfortable position for him, crouched awkwardly in front of you while holding you to his chest, but he stayed.

He stayed until your breathing had levelled out, and your grip on his shirt had loosened.

“There you go,” Kuroo murmured, letting you go. He shifted to sit next to you, and you immediately missed his warmth. You found a little comfort as he looped an arm around your shoulder. 

You took a long, shaky breath. You weren’t sure how long you’d keep it together for, but you were glad for the reprieve.

“What are you doing here?” You sniffed, rubbing your nose with the back of your hand. He shouldn’t be here. You shouldn’t have made him worry about you. ****

“You didn’t show up for our little study session,” he said, eyebrows knitted together. “I tried texting you, but you didn’t respond. And I couldn’t find you anywhere.”

 _Shit_. You’d forgotten to tell him you’d ‘headed home early.’

“I was worried about you,” he murmured, giving your shoulder a squeeze.

You swallowed roughly, the guilt bubbling up in your chest.

“I’m sorry **–** ”

“No.” Kuroo shook his head. “Don’t apologize. If you need to get it out, you need to get it out.”

You bit your lip, looking down at your hands. Your knuckles blanched pale as you clenched the fabric of your skirt.

“And,” he swallowed, “if you need to talk to someone… I’m here.”

Your breath caught in your throat as you felt everything rush back. The fight. The loneliness. The insomnia.

Kuroo didn’t need to hear this. And you didn’t want to burden him with this.

But _God_ , you needed to talk to _someone_. ****

“I- I had an argument with Hana,” you sniffed, fingers playing with the hem of your jacket.

You could barely remember how it started. Something stupid, probably. Something immature. But it had blown way out of proportion, and she wasn’t speaking to you anymore. You’d been spending your lunchtimes alone, behind the gym or in an empty classroom. You didn’t have the strength to face the rest of your friends, nor did you know what she’d been telling them.

It had struck at the worst possible time, too. The usual anxieties about grades and the future had been compounding recently. You’d been a bit more down than usual, and this whole Hana debacle had exacerbated that. You were usually able to manage feelings like this, finding ways to keep your head above water.

But not this time.

“I just,” you swallowed, squeezing your eyes shut. “I just feel like something’s missing. And, and I’m… there’s… there’s this _gap_ in my heart, and I don’t know how to stop feeling so _empty_.”

You took a deep breath, feeling it tremble through your body. “But… but I also just feel so _numb_.”

And all of it, even the numbness, was overwhelming. No matter how desperately you tried to distract yourself, you couldn’t. Nothing worked. You’d lost too many nights sitting at the bottom of your shower, letting the water run down your back as your mind ran in the same repeating circles.

You were exhausted.

“And part of me,” you swallowed, your throat rough and dry as your emotions tried to hammer themselves into something coherent. “Part of me feels like… like it’s _wrong_ to feel like this.”

God, that felt stupid. Stupid, but true. On top of everything, you felt defunct.

And frankly, you couldn’t say why. Was it shame? Guilt? Something else?

“Hey.” Kuroo’s voice was low, almost soft as he wrapped an arm around your shoulder. “You’re gonna feel what you’re gonna feel,” he murmured, “You shouldn’t feel guilty about that, okay?”

He felt you tremble as you tried to take a deep breath.

He knew that your pain wasn’t a one-to-one reflection of his own. He knew that he wouldn’t be able to understand exactly what you were going through.

But he knew what it was like to be a small child, so afraid, so alone, without an understanding of what was really going on around him.

He knew what it was like to feel as if something was missing, like there was a constant gap in your heart. He’d felt that way when his parents had split up. He’d only been a kid, too young to properly comprehend _why_ that had been happening.

All he had known was that his family had crumbled to pieces around him. And then his mother was gone, half a world away with little more than a kiss on his forehead as a goodbye. He hadn’t been ready for it. He had felt like he might never be.

That feeling of separation had followed him, even into his teen years. It was quieter now, a half-whisper on the bad days. Usually, he could ignore it, setting his mind to more productive concerns. But, it never quite disappeared.

Kuroo knew what it was like to be lonely.

And he hated seeing you go through the exact same thing.

Lonely. Afraid. Probably hoping that someone, somewhere, would acknowledge your pain.

That was the worst part. Wanting your suffering to be known. Wanting someone to look at all of it, to see it for what it was. But no matter how palpable that desire was, how desperately you wanted it, it was too terrifying. To speak up was to be a burden. To speak up was to expose yourself to pity; and that was always the last thing you needed.

Pity’s useless. All you were asking for, all you really wanted was understanding. Acknowledgment. To have someone _see_.

He knew exactly what that was like.

“You, uh…” The sentiment caught in his throat, somehow both persistent and reticent.

“You don’t have to do this alone.”

They were the very words he’d wished someone had said to him all those years ago. The words he’d wanted someone to _offer_ him, a child who didn’t know how to reach out. To cry out for help.

And in that moment, with his arms around the manager who had looked after him and his boys _so_ well, Kuroo felt that call. ****

✉

 _[passable at best] 8:30 PM_ : hey

 _[passable at best] 8:30 PM_ : how are you feeling?

 _[YOU] 8:45 PM_ : alright

 _[YOU] 8:45 PM_ : i ate dinner and i’ve just been watching youtube

 _[YOU] 8:46 PM_ : and i’ve been drinking a lot of water

 _[passable at best] 8:46 PM_ : i’m glad to hear that

 _[passable at best] 8:46 PM_ : make sure you get an early night, yeah?

 _[YOU] 8:47 PM_ : i’ll try

 _[passable at best] 8:47 PM_ : and if you need anything, please text me

✧ ✧ ✧

“Come to the temple with me.”

The surprise was evident on your face. You’re glad he couldn’t see you. “What… just us?”

“Yeah.” There’s a pause. An almost painful one. “I couldn’t get Kenma to leave the house, so…”

You pretended you weren’t disappointed. If anyone could see you, they wouldn’t be convinced.

“Oh, well, uh…” Your fists curled into your nightgown. “Sure.”

“Great!” You could hear the smile in his voice. It’s the one you like best; full of sunlight, pure and whole. The one that reached his eyes. “I’ll, uh… see you at eight?”

Usually, if someone had called you at seven-thirty in the morning, you would’ve simply ignored them. But when you’d seen that it was him, you’d answered immediately. The lack of hesitation was almost frightening.

There was no reason that your fondness for a certain Kuroo Tetsurou should scare you. You just knew that you adored the guy. In less than a year, he’d become one of your favourite people. And, he’d been such a solid support for you. Of course you’d go to the temple with him. 

But as you stood at the temple steps, swallowed up by a coat and two jumpers, you wondered if anyone was worth being _this_ cold for.

“Sorry I’m late.”

You glared up at him, nose embarrassingly red.

“What?” He groaned, hands dug deep in his pockets.

“It’s cold.”

“You think I don’t know that?”

“It’s eight in the morning.”

“Hey,” he grinned, reaching up and ruffling your hair with a gloved hand. “You could’ve said no.”

You huffed. Unfortunately, he was right.

“Well, I’m touched,” he chuckled, looking up at the sky. “It’s a nice morning, though.” He looked back down at you with a grin. He was far too peppy for this hour of the morning. “You ready?”

The walk up the steps was almost laborious, given just how cold it was. Your breath misted in front of you as you told each other about your first dreams of the year; he’s still regaling a tale about Kenma turning into a dragon with five heads and chasing him through the streets of Tokyo by the time you reach the fortunes.

You tried to shake off the superstitious jitters as you carefully chose one of the knots on the string. Kuroo showed much less care.

As you read the fortune written out on your strip, you let out a surreptitious sigh of relief. You looked at Kuroo, tilting your head.

“What’d you get?” You sniffled. You hoped you wouldn’t get a cold from this.

“Bad luck,” he said, turning the strip towards you.

You snorted. “Oh, ow.”

He shrugged. “It’s not that big of a deal.” His expression said otherwise; it was that half-grimace he had whenever he didn’t want to admit he was wrong. Or that Bokuto had done something cool.

“Really?” You grinned, tilting your head at him. “You’re not bothered by it at _all_?”

“Alright, what did you get then?” He peered down at you, puffing out his chest.

“A little luck.” You held your strip towards him, and he scowled.

“Bad luck’s more exciting,” he mumbled.

“Don’t be mad about it,” you smiled, nudging him with your elbow. “God just likes me more.”

“Oi,” he huffed, ruffling your hair with a cold hand.

“Hey!” You wacked his hand away, but he just cackled.

“Anyway, you’ve forgotten the most important part of a temple visit,” he yawned, looking back at the fortunes lined up on the strings.

“Hm?” You frowned.

“You gotta make a promise,” he sniffled, his fortune scrunched up in his hand.

You pouted, your hands dug deep in your pockets. A promise, huh? Did he mean a wish? You weren’t about to argue the point. He’d win it, anyway.

“You go first,” you mumbled, a little embarrassed by the fact that nothing was coming to mind.

He paused, staring at you for a moment. You squinted back, perhaps half as a challenge.

“Hm,” Kuroo puffed his cheeks out, looking up at the sky for a moment. “I promise… to always be there for you. No matter what.”

You blushed. What sort of promise was _that_? And why did it make you feel like… _this_?

_Thwump!_

You were only half aware of it as you punched him in the stomach.

“What was that for?” He wheezed, hands clamped on his stomach as he stumbled back a few steps.

“You can’t say things like that!” You whined, feeling the colour in your cheeks growing deeper.

“Why not?” There was something a little too genuine in his frown.

“Because I was going to say something really lame!” It was only eight-thirty in the morning, and Kuroo had already worked his way under your skin. And you weren’t entirely sure he’d meant to. “If I knew you were gonna say something like that, I’d’ve said it back.”

He raised an eyebrow at you. “You still can, you know.”

“Oh.” Yeah. You could.

That was all he needed. In an instant, that familiar grin was once again adorning his face, and he was towering over you. A little closer than maybe was appropriate.

“Is that… a blush I see?” Oh, he looked _far_ too pleased with himself. You had half a mind to punch him again.

“Shut up,” you huffed.

“Aw, have I made you all embarrassed?” He grinned, ruffling your hair. “I’m sorry,” he said, the words spoiled by his fake pout.

“If you don’t shut up, I won’t say it,” you threatened, glaring at him as resolutely as you could. The weird twang in your chest made it more difficult than it usually was.

He shut his mouth immediately, eyes a little bigger and much more expectant than usual.

“Kuroo Tetsurou–”

“Are you about to propose?”

“You know what? Nevermind–”

“No, no, no! I’m sorry!” His shoulders were slouched towards you, head tilted to the side and a bright smile on his face. “I’ll shut up.”

You took a deep breath. It certainly felt a bit like you were trying to propose to him. You shuffled that thought out of your mind as quickly as you could. Once again, Kuroo had put you in a situation you hadn’t quite anticipated.

“No matter what comes, and no matter how irritating you are–”

“Hey!”

“–I promise that I’ll be there to support you,” you managed to say, cheeks flaring and fists clenched. “I… really care about you.”

You couldn’t bear the look he was giving you. It was the look you’d give something you positively adored – something you believed would bring nothing but light to your life.It was a look so full of affection that you felt like you might shatter beneath it.

He reached out and wrapped you in his arms, pulling you gently into his chest. You snuck your arms under his jacket, circling them around his waist. You’d done it mostly on instinct, but you weren’t upset about it. It’s warm, and it’s nice, and you didn’t want to question it. 

There’s too much to worry about – studies, volleyball, the fact that it’s really not all that long until you’re third years. That took precedence. Whatever’s going on here – whatever _this_ was – couldn’t take priority.

All you knew for certain was that you loved Kuroo Tetsurou. In what way didn’t matter. And this in-between, this unnamed space was comfortable. And, as far as you could tell, it belonged to both of you. If he didn’t want to say anything about it, then neither did you.

✉

 _[i can be your angle] 5:21 PM_ : hey hey

 _[YOU] 5:21 PM_ : hey hey hey!

 _[i can be your angle] 5:21 PM_ : no don’t do that

 _[i can be your angle] 5:21 PM_ : anyway, i just wanted to make sure you’re practicing appropriate after-cold care

 _[YOU] 5:21 PM_ : why do you always have to phrase things Like That

 _[i can be your angle] 5:22 PM_ : no idea what you’re talking about

 _[i can be your angle] 5:22 PM_ : anyway, drink a tea or two, stick a heat pack (or seven) in the microwave, and rug up

 _[i can be your angle] 5:22 PM_ : can’t have you going and catching a cold


	2. part 2

You supposed you felt a little bad for revelling in the fact that the third years were leaving the club. Them leaving meant Kenma would finally know some peace, safe from their heckling. It was difficult to work up any sadness at your upperclassmen’s departure, even if you had spent a substantial amount of time with them. 

But, that little nugget of quasi-guilt was absolutely trumped by the sheer delight of seeing Kuroo be handed the mantle of captain. 

You weren’t surprised. There’s something of a natural leader to him, and he was already doing a great job of holding the first and second years together. His fellow year-mates were positively _beaming_ as congratulations rang throughout the gym, Kuroo’s cheeks flushed a little with a mixture of pride and embarrassment. 

You were waiting your turn to congratulate him, heart full just from watching him get the praise that he deserved. You were happy to observe, really. Especially when he looked so _honoured_ , so _happy_ when Coach Naoi gave him a congratulatory pat on the back. 

Finally Kuroo turned to you, eyes bright as he held his arms out. You jumped into them on instinct, wrapping your own arms around his neck. He hoisted you off the ground in one smooth move, twirling you round. A squeal escaped you before you could stop it, but he didn’t seem to care. He was just cackling. 

You couldn’t quite tell if the thrumming in your chest was due to a short adrenaline spike or because you’re so close to him. 

He finally put you down and pulled away, his hands moving up to hold you by your shoulders. 

He smiled at you. In that moment, you thought that his features should only ever hold a smile. 

You’d always been kind of aware that Kuroo was a pretty attractive guy. He was tall, fairly muscular, and his face wasn’t too bad for a teenage boy. You’re not _blind_ , after all. 

But this was the first time that you’d really _felt_ it for yourself. 

He’s got a certain twinkle in his eye that you didn’t quite know how to read. For some reason, it made you feel bad. 

You tried your best not to think about it. Not while you were still in the gym. Not while the two of you got celebratory ice cream with Kenma on your way to the train station. Not while he walked you home, chatting your ear off about what his plans were for the next year. 

You just tried to distract yourself with the fact that he was so _happy_. 

“You know,” Kuroo sighed, looking up at the sky. “I’m not sure about this whole captain thing.”

“Isn’t it a bit late for doubts?” You scoffed. He’d spent the past hour or so being delighted by it. You’d wondered when the overthinking would kick in. Not that you could really rag on him for it, all things considered. 

“I don’t mean like _that_ ,” he shook his head, pursing his lips. “I don’t know. It’s just…” 

“Stressful?” 

“Kind of,” Kuroo shrugged. “It makes it all feel very real, you know? We’re gonna be third years soon.” 

You shivered. “Don’t remind me.” 

“You’re going to have to face reality one day, you know,” he chuckled, ruffling your hair with one hand. He was really making a habit of that, wasn’t he? 

“Hush,” you sighed, waving a hand at him. 

He was right, though. Third year was getting closer and closer. Kuroo being made captain was just a more pressing reminder. It sounded like quite the responsibility, but you knew he was up to the challenge. 

You’d spoken about it a little bit before; mostly your theories about who’d get saddled with the title. It could only really be between him and Kai, but he’d definitely seemed to express some _interest_. 

“This is what you wanted, right?” You asked, looking up at him. 

He gave you a half-smile. “I was kinda hoping for it, I guess.” 

“Why are you worried, then?” You asked, tilting your head at him. “Don’t tell me you’re worried you won’t be any good at it.”

“Wow, _harsh_!” He nudged you with his elbow, but he was grinning. 

You rolled your eyes at him, nudging him back. “You’re a great fit for it, okay?” 

“Am I?” He hummed, closing the distance between you. You didn’t feel the need to move as you walked along, arms brushing each other. 

You knew that tone of voice. He was trying to lead you in a certain direction; to say certain things. Usually compliments that he’d laud over you later. Today, you’d take the bait willingly. But just this one time. 

“You’re gonna be great at it, Tetsurou,” you sighed. “You’re more caring than you let on, you’re mature enough, and you know how to use everyone’s strengths,” you rattled off, gripping the strap of your bag with blanched knuckles. “I can’t think of anyone better for the job.” 

You weren’t lying about any of it. He knew when to reign Yamamoto in, he gave Kenma space while still pushing him to be his best, and he’d long moved past his petty rivalry with Yaku. You’d watched him look after each and every one of his teammates in little ways, and you’d seen how he’d manage to bring them together as a cohesive unit – even though he hadn’t been in any position of authority.

You weren’t going to say all of that, of course. You weren’t even sure how to put it in a way that didn’t sound exceedingly awkward. But you admired him. A lot. 

You looked up at him. He’d stopped walking, and he’d brought one of his arms up to cover his face. You stepped towards him, tilting your head. 

“You okay?”

“Mhm.” His neck was a bright scarlet. You bit back a laugh.

“Tetsurou?” 

“Just give me a minute,” he mumbled, voice all muffled.

You laughed. “What’re you all embarrassed for?”

“I didn’t think you’d say _that_!” He whined, dropping his arm to his side and burying his hands in his pockets. His face was just as bright as his neck. It was kind of cute. 

“Oh come on, you were practically begging me to!” You scoffed, nudging him with your shoulder. “You’re not slick, you know!”

“Okay, _maybe_ I was fishing for compliments,” he laughed, looping an arm around your shoulders in some attempt to contain you. “But you didn’t have to get so _sappy_!” 

“I wasn’t even that sappy,” you rolled your eyes, leaning into him. “You really can’t handle sincerity, can you?”

“Shut up.” 

✉

 _[god’s least favourite] 9:34_ _PM_ : oi

 _[YOU] 9:34 PM_ : rude 

_[god’s least favourite] 9:34 PM_ : you do realise you’ve got to show me some more respect now 

_[god’s least favourite] 9:34 PM_ : seeing as i’m captain and all

 _[YOU] 9:35 PM_ : bold of you to think i showed you any respect in the first place 

_[god’s least favourite] 9:35 PM_ : excuse me 

_[god’s least favourite] 9:35 PM_ : you’re officially obligated to refer to me as captain now 

_[YOU] 9:36 PM_ : don’t wanna 

_[YOU] 9:36 PM_ : manager trumps captain

 _[YOU] 9:36 PM_ : just ask the boys

 _[YOU] 9:36 PM_ : they’ll side with me on this one 

_[god’s least favourite] 9:39 PM_ : good luck with that chemistry exam :) 

_[YOU] 9:39 PM_ : NO TETSUROU I’M SORRY 

_[YOU] 9:39 PM_ : I TAKE IT BACK PLEASE 

✧ ✧ ✧

Inviting you to his house shouldn’t be a big deal. You’re friends. He’d been to your house a fair few times. He got along wonderfully with your family. He had no doubts that you’d get along well with his family, too. And there was absolutely nothing weird going on between the two of you. 

But for some reason, the thought of you meeting his family sparked a little anxiety inside his chest. And it certainly wasn’t helped by how _smug_ his family was being about the whole thing. 

He’d managed to shake off his father and his grandfather, both of whom had busied themselves in the little vegetable garden for the morning. His grandmother, however, was an entirely different challenge. 

“So.” His grandmother smiled at him, tilting her head at him in a deceptively innocent way. “You’re inviting a girl over, Tetsu?”

“It’s not like that, Obaa-chan,” Kuroo sighed, running a hand through his hair. 

“Are you sure, Tetsu?” She chuckled. “That blush on your cheeks says otherwise.” 

“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” Kuroo mumbled, his brow furrowed as he poured some hot water into a little tea cup for her. 

“Well, your father and I were just innocently chatting about how you _never_ bring girls over,” his grandmother said, her face graced with a mischievous smile. “Are you embarrassed by us, dear Tetsu?” 

“You caught me, Baa-chan,” he chuckled, using a spoon to mix a bit of honey into her tea. “I’m actually a bit of a Casanova.” 

She faked a gasp, placing an incensed hand on her chest. “Oh goodness, Tetsurou! I thought we raised you better than that!” 

“You know what they say,” Kuroo grinned. “Nature and nurture, and all that.” 

His grandmother chuckled. “Men really will find any excuse to be terrible people, won’t they?” 

He snorted at that. “ _Wow_! I didn’t know you woke up today deciding to absolutely _obliterate_ every man ever.” 

She cackled, shaking her head. Kuroo took a quick sip of the tea to test the temperature. Deciding it was appropriate, he turned around to give it to her, hoping his cheeks had cooled down at that point.

“Well, you must like this one more than the rest,” his grandmother cooed, resting her chin on her hand as he placed the tea cup in front of her. “Seeing as you’re bringing her over and all.” 

“She’s just a good friend,” Kuroo mumbled, scratching the back of his neck. 

“Blushing _and_ scratching your neck!” His grandmother’s eyes shone with delight. “My, my, Tetsu, you are nervous.” 

He opened his mouth to retort, but nothing came. Sure, he usually got the jump on everyone else, but there was no outsmarting his own grandmother. 

The doorbell chimed through the house. 

“You better go and greet your lady, little Casanova,” his grandmother raised a pertinent eyebrow at him, taking a sip of her tea. 

“I told you, it’s not like that,” Kuroo huffed, waving a hand at her. 

“Whatever you say, Tetsu.”

But he was already gone, half-running to the front door. 

By the time he opened the door, you were halfway down the front path, back turned to him as you looked around. 

“Leaving already?” He smiled, trying to look as composed as possible.

“Yeah,” you grinned, looking over your shoulder at him. “Already bored.” 

Kuroo scoffed, shaking his head. “To think I offer you the privilege of coming to _my_ house–” 

“Oh, yes, the great honour of being allowed into the Kuroo household,” you played along, half-skipping back to the front door and slipping your shoes off. “I will finally step foot in it’s hallowed halls… a privilege I have not yet been granted.” 

Kuroo snorted, moving to ruffle your hair. “You sound like someone out of one of Kenma’s games.” 

“That’s the point,” you shrugged, slapping his hand away. “Oi. I tried to make it look presentable.” 

“Yeah, yeah,” he chuckled, stepping aside to let you in. He did his absolute best to ignore just how pretty you looked today. 

He took a deep breath. Before you two would be allowed to just hang out, you’d have to meet his family. And though he loved them more than anything, they had the potential to cause quite the ruckus. 

But it went _fine_. His family managed to resist their innate urge to tease, and you held a conversation with each of them quite smoothly. His grandmother had taken a particular liking to you – as he’d expected – and he could tell that you were relieved by it. You hadn’t told him you were nervous about meeting his family, but he was well-acquainted with your tells. You’d relaxed within the hour, which was a feat worth celebrating. 

The only issue was that his family wouldn’t leave you _alone_. His father had left for work pretty soon after you’d arrived – but not before you’d noted the similarities between him and his son. Though you’d said his dad had better hair. 

His grandparents kept flitting between the living room and the kitchen, always finding some conversation to start before Kuroo could usher you out of there. He knew it _should_ be annoying, but there’s something endearing about watching you talk to his grandmother so easily. And as always, his grandmother had really _listened_ to him – he’d warned her a few days ago that you could get a bit nervous. He could see that she was doing everything she could to ensure you were comfortable. 

His grandmother didn’t _say_ anything about their earlier conversation, much to his relief. Although, he’d appreciate it if she stopped waggling her eyebrows at him whenever your back was turned. 

But of course, your favourite member of his household was his dog. 

He was a friendly little thing, a little bigger than usual for his breed, but with a lot of love to give. You’d bonded immediately. 

“He’s beautiful,” you gasped, scratching behind the Akita’s ears. “What’s his name?”

“Kuroo Coco Sora Kuu Inu-chan.” 

You blinked up at him. “Why… why so many?”

“We couldn’t agree on one name when we first got him,” Kuroo shrugged. “So he has four names.”

“Who’s responsible for Inu-chan?” You smirked, turning your attention back to Kuroo Coco Sora Kuu Inu-chan. Maybe you’d just stick with Coco. 

“Well, uh…”

“Couldn’t think of anything more creative?” 

“Listen.” Kuroo held up his hands, crouching down next to you. “I was like… eleven?”

“That’s no excuse.” 

“I’d like to see you come up with something better,” he scoffed, placing a large hand on Coco’s head. 

“Oh, _easy_ ,” you said. 

“Yeah? Prove it.” 

“There are much more important things to think about, you know,” his grandmother called out, her head poking from round the corner with a bright grin. 

“My pride is on the line, Baa-chan,” Kuroo grinned. “If I’m going to be mocked, I’d like to see her do better.” 

“Well _I_ need to steal her for a moment,” his grandmother beamed, turning to look at you. “Just ignore him, dearie. I have something to show you,” she smiled, eyes sparkling in the very same way Tetsurou’s did when he wanted to cause some mischief. So, it ran in the family. 

Next thing you knew, you were ushered to a couch with a mildly agitated Kuroo in tow.

“Take a look at these,” she said, handing you a pleather album as you sat yourself down. 

“Thank you,” you smiled, placing it in your lap. It felt almost sticky, the fabric and the corners well-worn with age. Kuroo plopped himself down next to you with a sigh, pouting a little. 

“Oh no,” Kuroo murmured as he noticed the object in your hands. 

“Oh _yes_ ,” his grandmother chuckled. 

Was this what you thought it was? You opened the book, to be greeted with – yep, that’s definitely Kuroo. As a _very_ unfortunate-looking baby. 

“Do you _have t_ o?” He groaned, sinking his face into his hand. 

“Of course I do,” his grandmother said innocently. “That darling Kenma of yours found it quite amusing, didn’t he?” 

You smiled at that thought. Kenma wouldn’t have been awfully expressive, but you had the feeling that Kuroo’s grandmother was just as perceptive as the boy sitting next to you. Obnoxious cleverness seemed to be a Kuroo family trait. 

You turned the page, another set of baby photos ready to delight you. 

“Why do you look so angry?” You laughed, pointing at one of him in a bright yellow onesie, barely four months old. 

“Because they put me in _that,_ ” he said. 

“What about this one?” You asked, pointing at a very forlorn-looking toddler in a crib. 

“That’s probably the first moment I comprehended my mortality.” 

You snorted, turning the page once more. 

As you moved through his younger years, his grandmother began to regale you with the story behind each photo. You weren’t surprised to hear that there’s a chaotic element to most of them. And as she spoke, you could tell just how much she loved him. Just how proud she was of the young man he’d grown up to be. 

It made the whole experience all the more _fun_. There’s such a wealth of love amongst these pages, a sense of genuine and total adoration for the boy in the photos. His grandmother had acted like she had gotten this out to embarrass him – but, it seemed more like she’d wanted to brag about her little golden boy. 

There’s so many photos. Enough that you started to lose track. 

But, you froze _immediately_ on a certain page. Two young boys, splattered with mud. One of them’s a little taller, grinning at the camera with a volleyball in hand. The other boy was hidden behind him, eyes a little round and spooked, but the smallest of smiles on his lips.

“Is that _Kenma_?” You gasped, leaning forward to get a better look. 

“The one and only,” Kuroo smiled. 

“He looks _tiny_!”

“He was.” 

“And that’s you?” You asked, pointing at a little boy with wild hair and a brilliant grin on his face. 

“Yeah,” he chuckled, his gaze settling on your face. 

“Your hair hasn’t changed,” you laughed, turning to smile at him. “Have you ever actually used a hairbrush? Or have you just made an active choice never to touch one?” 

“Look.” Kuroo shifted to face you a little more directly, jabbing one finger at his hair. “You try dealing with _this_ every morning.” 

You laughed, returning to the album. You pressed a hand to your chest absent-mindedly. God, this feeling was a little overwhelming; if you were forced to put it into words, you’d settle on ‘absolute fondness’. All you knew was that looking at this photo made you feel so _soft_. So full of love. 

“You alright?” He asked, a hand instinctively moving to your back. 

“I’m fine,” you smiled. “Just a little emotional.” 

For whatever reason, he couldn’t stop looking at your face. He’d seen you smile plenty of times, and the expression always looked good on you. But there’s something about _this_ smile, in _this_ moment, that’s so mesmerising. 

You didn’t notice, so engrossed in your own fondness as you look down at two of your closest friends, young, covered in mud and _happy_. It’s not your memory to look back on, but you’re glad you’ve been permitted a peek into it.

And Kuroo didn’t notice his grandmother watching him from the other side of the couch, observing him with a positively amused twinkle in her eye. 

She could already tell just how well you two got along. How happy you could make each other. And nothing could delight her more. And even if she hadn’t been watching you interact all day, this look he was giving you right now was evidence enough of the rich affection he held for you. 

She just hoped she wouldn’t have to knock some sense into the poor boy, dense as he can be. 

✉

 _[YOU] 9:33 PM_ : tetsu 

_[YOU] 9:33 PM_ : tetsu tetsu tetsu

 _[emotionally constipated] 9:33 PM_ : mm? 

_[YOU] 9:33 PM_ : i need photos of coco Right Now

 _[emotionally constipated] 9:33 PM_ : that’s inu-chan to you 

_[YOU] 9:33 PM_ : tetsu i’m Desperate 

_[YOU] 9:33 PM_ : i need to see him 

_[YOU] 9:34 PM_ : if i don’t see him i’ll Die 

_[YOU] 9:34 PM_ : also please tell your grandmother that i adore her

 _[emotionally constipated] 9:34 PM_ : hahah i’m glad you had such a good time 

_[YOU] 9:35 PM_ : i really did :( 

_[YOU] 9:35 PM_ : can i move into your attic?

 _[emotionally constipated] 9:35 PM_ : no

✧ ✧ ✧

“They’re going to be a handful,” you smiled, zipping up your bag.

“Yeah,” he chuckled, looking down at your hunched form. “But you’re already attached to them, right?”

“They’re sweet,” you said, standing up. “And, I think they’ve got a lot of potential.”

“For giving Yaku an aneurism, maybe.”

“But Tetsurou,” you grinned, “that’s the best part!”

“Got it in for Yaku, have you?” He raised an eyebrow at you, but he did a pretty poor job of wiping the smile off his own face.

“Don’t push your agenda onto me,” you chuckled. “I’m not the one who had stupid little spats with him, you know.”

“What can I say? I was young and foolish, once upon a time.”

“You say that like you’re a geriatric.”

“I’ve grown a lot this past year,” he sighed, holding up his hands.

You shot him a look; one that’s supposed to tell him how very silly he was. But he’d been getting better at reading in-between the lines, and he knew that there’s fondness there. A deep, untempered well of fondness that neither of you knew how to put into words.

“Bold words, from someone who still laughs at the word ‘cock’.” That wasn’t quite what he’d expected you to say, but they were certainly words he had to defend himself against.

“Look, I’m _just_ saying that it’s exactly the sort of word they’d use in porn–”

“Oh, so you _do_ watch it then?”

It’s not that he thought there’s anything all that wrong with watching porn. He’s a teenager – he was going to get curious. And that was fine. But the thought of you _knowing_ about it made him nervous. What if you thought less of him for it, for whatever reason? What if the knowledge made you uncomfortable?

“I–” He stuttered, painfully aware of how clammy his hands were.“I didn’t necessarily _say_ that–”

“Then how do you know?” A smile he didn’t quite like spread across your face.

“I just– Yamamoto–”

“I can’t believe you’d throw him under the bus like this!” You gasped.

“I’m _not_ , I’m just relaying a _fact_ –” He could feel his ears burning.

“And here I was, thinking you’d be the sort of captain who’d look out for his teammates. You know what, Tetsurou? I’m surprised _and_ disappointed.” You were having far too much fun with this. And he was playing right into your hands.

“I can’t believe you’re persecuting me for no good reason.” He tried to find his footing again, to try and turn it on _you_. He knew it’s not going to work, but it’s worth a try.

“I have a perfectly adequate reason, thank you very much.”

“Yeah? And what’s that?”

“You’re a teenage boy. You know… a scourge on this planet.” You lowered your voice, as if you were letting him in on a dark secret.

“ _Excuse me_?”

“I meant what I said.”

“Then why be our manager, hm? Why subject yourself to the company of teenage boys every day?”

You laughed. He knew he loved the sound a little more than he should. “Well, you got me there.”

He smiled at you. God, he hoped his face wasn’t giving too much away.

You’re just chatting in a gym. Just acting like teenagers. But it’s the type of moment he’s grateful for. The sort that made him feel bad for that multitude of other universes where he didn’t have the privilege of knowing you. He felt a little cocky about it, too, even if that’s a bit childish.

“Hurry up,” he sighed, nudging you with his elbow. “I wanna go home.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you sighed. “Thank you, by the way.”

“Hm?”

“For still walking me home,” you smiled up at him. “I don’t think I’ve said thanks yet.”

“Pft.” Kuroo shook his head. “You don’t deserve it, I can tell you that.”

You faked a gasp, one hand on your chest. “And here I thought we _were friends_.”

“And here _I_ thought that you held me in higher esteem,” he chuckled.

“Huh?” You tilted your head at him as you walked towards the doors of the gym.

“You think I’m just a… you know,” he grinned, leaning down closer to you. He didn’t catch the blush on your cheeks as you stepped out into the dusk. “A teenage boy.”

You laughed, shaking your head. “ _Wow_ , you really took that to heart, huh?”

“Here I am, subjecting myself to the mortifying ordeal of being known, and you have the gall to speak to me like this,” he sighed, looking up to the sky.

“Oh, you’re not so bad,” you giggled, looping your arm through his. He thought his heart might give out, small as the gesture may be. “If it makes you feel any better… you’re my favourite teenage boy.”

Oh, now that’s just too much.

“Oi,” he barked, nudging you a little roughly. You just laughed. “You can’t just say shit like that.”

“Why not?”

“Because–” The words caught in his throat, and he didn’t quite know what to say. There were so many ways this could go; some of them were frankly terrifying. “You’ve just gotta warn a guy before being that sappy, alright?”

So, he evaded.

“I’ll be more careful next time,” you bit your lip. But you smiled.

✉

 _[the worst member of the kuroo household] 12:24 AM_ : fyi, if i did in fact watch porn, i’d want you to know that i’d ensure it was ethically sourced

 _[YOU] 12:24 AM_ : tetsurou it is 12:30 in the morning

 _[YOU] 12:24 AM_ : what does this even mean

 _[YOU] 12:24 AM_ : why do i need to know this

 _[YOU] 12:24 AM_ : what are you even doing up

 _[YOU] 12:24 AM_ : don’t tell me–

 _[YOU] 12:25 AM_ : omg do 10 cents of your proceeds go to farmers

 _[YOU] 12:25 AM_ : OMG sustainable porn

 _[YOU] 12:25 AM_ : i’m so proud of you for doing your part for the environment :’)

 _[the worst member of the kuroo household] 12:25 AM_ : WHY ARE YOU ASSUMING THE WORST

 _[the worst member of the kuroo household] 12:25 AM_ : I’M NOT DLKDDKLJ I JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW THAT I’M NOT SUPPORTING A SHITTY INDUSTRY OKAY

 _[the worst member of the kuroo household] 12:26 AM_ : i know parts of it are bad and exploitative and if i did so happen to consume that kind of content, i’d avoid that. that’s all i’m trying to say

 _[YOU] 12:26 AM_ : omg, look at you supporting indie artists

 _[the worst member of the kuroo household] 12:26 AM_ : i’m losing my mind–

 _[YOU] 12:26 AM_ : it’s okay, for your sake i’ll pretend i can’t read

 _[the worst member of the kuroo household] 12:26 AM_ : please don’t send this to yaku

 _[YOU] 12:27 AM_ : :)

 _[the worst member of the kuroo household] 12:29 AM_ : wait, what are you even doing up?

 _[YOU] 12:29 AM_ : ;) none of your business, that’s what

 _[the worst member of the kuroo household] 12:30 AM_ : DON’T SAY THINGS LIKE THAT

 _[YOU] 12:30 AM_ : ;)

✧ ✧ ✧

Kuroo didn’t mean to stare. It’s just that during practice, his gaze always found its way back to you. 

He just liked making sure you’re doing okay. During second year, he’d check for signs of anxiety or discomfort; you had understandably feared a hit from a stray ball, and you had seemed to find the third years too intimidating to really connect with. But now? 

Now, he had the pleasure of watching you flourish. You managed to get along with each member of the team so _well_ , from Inuoka to Kenma. You always seemed to know the right thing to say, the right way to encourage them (or in a certain setter’s case, when to give them some space). To varying degrees, they’d come to rely on you – both as a manager, and as a friend. You hadn’t shied away from the challenge. You’d taken the time to get to know each and every one of them; ‘my kids,’ as you’d called them in conversation with your other third years. Yaku had kicked up a fuss to that little moniker, but he was outnumbered. 

Most importantly, you were smiling a lot more. Kuroo knew that those feelings you were grappling with didn’t go away overnight. They didn’t pack themselves up and disappear because you’d found one good thing in life. But there’s relief in knowing you’ve got people to rely on, people who helped make you _smile_. He knew, for certain, that you had a support system that adored you. And he couldn’t feel more humbled to be a part of it. 

So, maybe he wasn’t just checking to see if you’re okay. Not anymore, at least. 

No, he just liked seeing you be happy. 

At that moment, you were sat on the ground, bandages in your lap with a water bottle and bunch of bananas to one side and Lev to the other. You were tending to an minor injury he’d gotten as the result of a rather stupid little accident. Kuroo was close enough that he could hear you; as per usual with Lev, you were gently reprimanding him. With good reason. 

“You’ve gotta be more careful,” you hummed, wrapping a bandage gently around Lev’s finger. You weren’t quite sure what had happened – as far as you could tell, he’d somehow tried to hit the ball incorrectly? – but Lev had to sit out for a while. 

And he _hated_ it. He wasn’t very good at masking his emotions. Nor did he feel much of a need to even try. 

“I _am_ ,” he whined, pouting at you. You hadn’t known him for all that long, in the grand scheme of things. But Lev was a pretty easy guy to pin down. 

Your eyes flashed as you looked up at him, and he wilted. 

“You just wanted to look cool, didn’t you?” 

“Well what’s the _point_ if I don’t look cool?” He grumbled, shoulders slouching.

You laughed, patting him on the arm. “You do realise volleyball isn’t all about looking cool, right? I’ve heard Kuroo try and explain that to you far too many times.” 

Out of all the first years, Lev had been the most… difficult. Inuoka was good-natured if excitable, Shibayama was gentle and well-meaning, and Teshiro was generally well-behaved. 

But Lev? Lev was a force of nature. You’d call him a whirlwind, but that didn’t seem wild enough. He was something like an earthquake and a fire storm happening all that once. And he didn’t seem to have any awareness of that. 

“Now, try to be more careful,” you smiled, tilting your head at him. “I want to see you out on the court! I love seeing that spike of yours!”

Lev beamed at that, his shoulders perking right up. If there was one thing Lev responded well to, it was praise. You just had to work out how to use that to your advantage. By some stroke of luck, he happened to be quite fond of you. That, at least, made your job easier. 

“But, you’ve got to listen to Kuroo more,” you sighed, standing up and crossing your arms. “And Yaku, for that matter. If you want to become Nekoma’s ace, you’ve got to get pretty damn good at defense, too.” 

Lev opened his mouth to reply, but you shook your head. “Trust me. You’ll shoot your way to the top in no time.” 

He made a little sound in the back of his throat, wiggling his now bandaged finger. 

“And eat this,” you sighed, handing him a banana. “Keep your sugars up.” 

Lev wasn’t looking at you or the banana. Instead, he was staring at something _beyond_ you, his eyes glinting with a certain intensity you’d come to dread. 

“What are you staring at?” You frowned, looking over your shoulder. 

“If I got enough of a running start, do you think I could jump over the net?”

“Lev, _no_!” 

Across the gym, Kuroo bit his lip, holding back a cackle. 

You’d really stepped into your role as manager, hadn’t you? You’d lost much of that initial nervousness, and you’d bonded with the first years quite well. You talked freely with the team, and you weren’t afraid to speak up if you had an idea or an observation. You laughed a lot more, too; whether that be at some of the antics the first years got up to or at Fukunaga’s puns or at Yamamoto being Yamamoto. No matter the source, he was always glad to hear the sound of your laugh ring out in the gym. 

You seemed _happy_ ; joyful, even. Knowing that you had people you connected with, people you felt _comfortable_ with was a relief. The team was closer now than it had ever been – and you’d even admitted to him, very quietly, that you felt a bit less lonely. That alone made Kuroo feel like he’d made the right choice in wrangling you this mad little group. 

“You’re so obvious,” Yaku scoffed, rolling his eyes at Kuroo. 

Kuroo flinched, taken completely unawares. He looked to his side quickly, noting that both Yaku _and_ Kai were giving him a certain knowing look that he didn’t like. Whatever they were thinking, it wasn’t _good_. 

“Hah?” Kuroo raised an eyebrow at his friend, pushing away the scant bit of panic that gripped his chest. 

“Staring at her during every practice isn’t exactly _subtle_ ,” Yaku snorted, wiping his forehead. “She’s going to catch on eventually.” 

“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” Kuroo mumbled, lifting his water bottle to his lips. 

Kai chuckled, bringing one fist up to cover his mouth.

“Oi,” Kuroo huffed, “Stop it.” 

“Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me,” Yaku grinned. “For now.” 

“Shut up,” Kuroo bunted Yaku’s back with one knee, violently hoping that his cheeks weren’t all red. 

“You’re really punching above your weight, you know,” Yaku sighed, propping his hands on his hips. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Oh, it’s _on_. 

Across the gym, you walked up to Kenma, a frown on your face. 

“I thought those two were supposed to have sorted things out?” You frowned, looking at Yaku and Kuroo mouthing off at each other. You couldn’t quite hear what they were saying, but they looked fervent. 

Kenma shrugged. “I dunno. They’re both pretty easy to rile up, so…” 

You smiled to yourself. Sure, everyone on the team was a little stupid in their own way. But that’s what made them all so endearing. So endearing, in fact, that you wanted to look after them as best you could. 

And you honestly tried not to play favourites. But it’s hard for you to _not_ pay particular attention to a certain middle blocker. 

✉

 _[YOU] 9:46 PM_ : yaku asked me to tell you to stop bullying him 

_[ethically sourced :)] 9:46 PM_ : I WASN’T BULLYING HIM 

_[YOU] 9:46 PM_ : but you were shouting at him 

_[ethically sourced :)] 9:47 PM_ : he deserved it

 _[YOU] 9:47 PM_ : i’ll be the judge of that

 _[YOU] 9:47 PM_ : what were you even arguing about?

 _[ethically sourced :)] 10:12 PM_ : doesn’t matter 

_[ethically sourced :)] 10:12 PM_ : anyway do you think it’s possible to pavlov lev? 

_[YOU] 10:12 PM_ : that’s one way to derail the conversation

 _[YOU] 10:16 PM_ : with what? 

_[ethically sourced :)] 10:16 PM_ : praise

 _[ethically sourced :)] 10:16 PM_ : specifically from you

 _[YOU] 10:16 PM_ : LKJDDKJL why?

 _[ethically sourced :)] 10:16 PM_ : because there’s nothing more motivating than that 

_[ethically sourced :)] 10:18 PM_ : for the first years

 _[ethically sourced :)] 10:18 PM_ : i meant for the first years 

_[ethically source :)] 10:20 PM_ : not me :)

 _[YOU] 10:21 PM_ : you know tetsu, lying is bad for the soul

✧ ✧ ✧

“Yeah, but who are we gonna date?” You huffed, brow furrowed as you glared at the screen. The synths of _Persona 5_ ’s idle music provided a deceptively soothing ambience as you made the protagonist run around in circles. 

The two of you sat on your bedroom floor with a smorgasbord of snacks, your backs relaxed against your bed frame. This issue of ‘who should we date?’ had been a consistent topic of conversation for the past two weeks. Kuroo was sure that it’d never get resolved. 

“My vote’s for Makato,” he shrugged, reaching into the bag of chips and taking a handful.

“You’re so typical,” you scoffed, shaking your head.

“Look,” he laughed, “We can date Ann if you really want to.”

“I’m just confused as to why _you_ don’t want to.” You pouted at him as you sat with your backs against your bed, shoulders pressed together. 

The issue of Takamaki Ann had been a surprising one to you; your argument was that she’d been the protagonist’s second friend, and had a wonderful bond with him. Kuroo had been less convinced. 

“It’s not that I don’t _want_ to,” Kuroo grinned. “It just feels like… I’m giving in.”

“Giving in?”

“Yeah,” he shrugged. “You know.”

“To… the boobs?”

He cackled at that. “That’s one way of putting it.”

“But she’s an _angel_ ,” you pouted. “It’s not her fault she got put in the latex catsuit.”

Kuroo grinned. “See, it’s fine for _you_ if you wanna date her. If I choose Ann, then I’m the target audience, you know? I’ve given into the whole pervert thing.”

“I think you’re forgetting that you can date your teacher in this game.”

“I’d genuinely blocked that out.”

You smiled at him, and his heart squeezed a little. He couldn’t say why, though.

“Alright, compromise. Who did Kenma date?”

“Uh… last time he played, he did the whole harem thing.”

“The _whole_ harem?”

“Yeah,” he nodded.

“Including the teacher?”

“Of course.”

You stared at him for a moment, expression something akin to shock.

“It was for an achievement,” Kuroo shrugged.

“There’s… a harem achievement?” You frowned. 

“Nah,” he shook his head. “But you get an achievement for dating all the romance options, and he didn’t really want to play the game ten times over.”

“Oh,” you nodded. “Right.”

A pause.

“He doesn’t have a favourite?”

“I guess if he was forced to pick, he’d go with Futaba.”

“Makes sense,” you nodded, a little pout on your face. Kuroo couldn’t help but smile at the look on your face. 

Kuroo chuckled, shaking his head. “And does it not make sense for me to choose Makato?”

“I didn’t _say_ that,” you rolled your eyes, pressing your arm against his.

He grinned, reaching over and plucking the controller from your hands. 

“Hey!”

“It’s my turn to play,” he smiled. “And I’m going to go and hang out with _Makato_.” 

You sighed, resting your head on his shoulder. You’d been doing that more and more recently. He still wasn’t quite used to it. “I’m not saying you can’t like her. I mean, she’s great, but… Ann’s right there.“ 

He didn’t say that it’s because Makato kind of reminded him of _you_. She’s smart, if a little stupid sometimes. You’re not the _same_ person by any stretch of the imagination, but he couldn’t get the association out of his head when he had first noticed it. It had endeared her towards him – maybe more than it should have. 

There was certainly some irony in the fact that she was the girl you were least interested in dating. 

You gasped suddenly, sitting up straight.

"What?” Kuroo frowned, disguising genuine concern with annoyance.

“There’s still another team member we haven’t met yet, right?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

“What if we want to date _her_?”

Kuroo laughed, resting his head against the bed. It’s nice to see you get invested in this so much. There’s something of a mix between pride and delight in his chest, knowing he’d brought you something that made you smile. There’s a part of him that wanted to make sure you’ve always got something to smile about. 

He’s relieved, really, that you had agreed to play this with him. It was quite the commitment – Kenma’s playthrough had ended up being what, one-hundred and thirty hours? – but Kuroo had asked you if you’d be up for it anyway. 

You’d agreed, and he’d felt unreasonably delighted by that. It was a bit stupid, but he liked that the game gave him a reason to spend time with you. Well, even _more_ time with you. When Kenma had told him just how long a single playthrough took, Kuroo had immediately presented the game to you. 

It’s not like the two of you were spending _less_ time together. It’s not even like he needed to have a consistent reason to spend time with you either. It had become something of a routine to spend every second evening at either of your houses; the general idea was still to study, but it was easier and easier to get distracted these days. Not that he was letting you get lazy or anything like that. There was just too much to talk about. 

Hell, you even knew each other’s families quite well at this point. Your family loved him, much to his relief. And, his family still _adored_ you. His grandparents were _still_ sending him knowing looks over dinner, even when you weren’t there. If he so much as mentioned your name in conversation, they’d start chuckling. 

It’s just that you’re a part of his life now. Someone who brought him comfort. Someone who could help him relax. And he wanted to hold onto that as best as he could. 

✉

 _[YOU] 12:01 PM_ : tetsu

 _[YOU] 12:01 PM_ : testu tetsu 

_[YOU] 12:01 PM_ : i desperately need your help :( 

_[tetsuwu] 12:01 PM_ : are you okay? 

_[tetsuwu] 12:01 PM_ : what can i do? 

_[YOU] 12:06 PM_ : i can’t stop changing my mind about which girl to date 

_[tetsuwu] 12:06 PM_ : oh my

 _[tetsuwu] 12:06 PM_ : GOD you had me genuinely worried 

_[YOU] 12:07 PM_ : :) 

_[tetsuwu] 12:07 PM_ : we can date ann if you really want 

_[YOU] 12:07 PM_ : it’s just that i think she’s the best match for the protagonist, you know?

 _[tetsuwu] 12:07 PM_ : yeah

 _[tetsuwu] 12:07 PM_ : the silent protagonist who barely has a personality except for what you project onto him

 _[YOU] 12:08 PM_ : D: so utilitarian

 _[tetsuwu] 12:08 PM_ : what? i’m right 

_[YOU] 12:09 PM_ : but tetsu my Immersion

 _[tetsuwu] 12:09 PM_ : you’ll live

 _[tetsuwu] 12:09 PM_ : also for the love of god can we please change my name from tetsuwu

 _[YOU] 12:09 PM_ : >:) 

✧ ✧ ✧

“I’m excited!” You beamed up at him, notebook clutched to your chest and jacket tied around your waist.

“You sure you can handle it?” He grinned, ruffling your hair habitually. “There’s gonna be a lot of teenage boys running about. I’m not sure you’re ready for such unbridled chaos.”

“Surely they can’t be much worse than our kids,” you smiled. “I mean, there’s Karasuno. But I’m as used to them as I can be. I think.” 

“Bold of you to assume that you’d _ever_ be used to Karasuno,” he chuckled, shaking his head. 

“Yeah, that’s fair,” you laughed. “I used to think that our kids were super chaotic, but then…” 

Kuroo smiled to himself. Seeing you get so _excited_ for this training camp did his heart some good. 

He couldn’t have imagined you being like this when he had first met you in second year; you’d really begun to open up, to express yourself. You were actually looking forward to working with the other managers. You’d even spoken about making friends with them. Honestly, it’s sweet. 

“Don’t forget to do your work, though,” he yawned as the two of you came to a stop in front of your house. Practice had run a little later than usual, which had messed up his plans a bit. He’d wanted to get home to work on his literature essay – the current bane of his existence – and to get your help. 

“Yeah, yeah,” you smiled. “Don’t worry, I’m on top of things. That timetable you made me really helps.”

He felt a little swell of pride at that. The study timetable had been primarily a test run, a set of suggestions he’d put forward in an attempt to help you quell your anxieties. But, it had worked wonderfully. He’d done his best to account for your study habits, practice, _and_ the fact that the two of you literally couldn’t get through twenty minutes without having a conversation that went completely off topic. 

Suffice to say that even he was impressed with how effective the timetable had actually been. 

“Anyway,” you yawned, waving at him as you turned to open your front door. “Goodnight.” 

“Oh, before you go,” he cleared his throat, making you turn back around. 

“Everything okay?” You asked. 

“Can I be a bother and ask you to read over my literature essay?” He asked, scratching the back of his neck. “I know it’s late, but…” 

“Sure,” you nodded. “On one condition.” 

He paused. He’d said those words to you once, hadn’t he? 

“You want me to buy you yakisoba, don’t you?” He grinned, pushing that little memory aside. 

You pouted. “How’d you know?”

“You’ve been craving it all week.” 

“Oh.” Your pout deepened. You always pulled this expression when he managed to be one step ahead.

“I’ll do it,” he shrugged. “But only because I’m desperate.”

You let out a little ‘ _whoop_ ’, turning back to your door with a little jump. God, you could be so cute sometimes. 

And then you were gone, flying through your front door with a simple, “see you later, Tetsu!” 

He watched you go with a frown etched on his brow.

It’s an inconspicuous little revelation, almost annoying in its mundanity.

How hadn’t he noticed you before? Why had it taken you begging him for help for him to look your way?

You were captivating.

It’s in the way your eyes lit up whenever you spoke about your passions – even if it was just which girl you should date in a video game. It’s in the variations of your laugh, each timbre seemingly tailored to each brand of stupid thing he might say. It’s in how your hands tended to each and every member of the team with such sincere adoration. Even with him.

It’s how you’re in all of him. In every thought, every decision, every absent-minded daydream. In each and every time he stopped and wondered, “what would she think?” In how every time he learned something new, saw something funny, he wanted to tell you about it. In how he’d structure his week around when he got to spend time with you.

But he’s just a high school student. Just a boy.

And that’s not how love had been explained to him. Not as something so quiet. Not as something so natural, so comfortable, with someone who brought him such comfort. Love was supposed to be difficult, challenging. It was supposed to choke you. Love was supposed to slap you in the face, demanding and all-consuming.

So, he figured it must not be love. He hoped it’s not love. It must have been something else entirely.

What that was, he didn’t know.

✉

 _[father of nine] 10:36 PM_ : here’s my essay

 _[father of nine] 10:36 PM_ : please tell me it makes some sense

 _[YOU] 10:36 PM_ : shh stop being so hard on yourself 

_[YOU] 10:37 PM_ : it can’t be worse than inuoka’s history essay, bless his soul 

_[father of nine] 10:37 PM_ : you’re an angel, thanks 

_[father of nine] 10:37 PM_ : * angle

 _[YOU] 10:37 PM_ : you say that like i’m not doing this for a price

 _[father of nine] 10:37 PM_ : you say that like you wouldn’t crack eventually 

_[YOU] 10:38 PM_ : oh, so you’ve got the gall to push your luck, do you? 

_[father of nine] 10:38 PM_ : :)


	3. interlude | after hours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ➵ a late night study session might just end with kuroo having a heart attack over how stupidly cute you are.

“But I’m _tired_ ,” you whine, plopping your face cheek-first onto your textbook.

“We’re all tired,” Kuroo goads, shaking his head. “Come on. The more we do now, the less we have to worry about later.”

“I _know_ ,” you whine. “You don’t need to keep reminding me.”

“I wouldn’t have to remind you if you just did your work,” he grins. “We know for a fact that leaving things to the last minute makes you really stressed.”

“Maybe I work best under pressure,” you mumble. “Ever considered that?”

“I have,” he smiles. “Now you tell me: is it worth the nervous breakdown?”

“You’re cruel and I hate you.”

“We both know that’s not true.”

“Don’t put words in my mouth,” you mutter.

“I think someone’s trying to procrastinate,” he chuckles, reaching over to ruffle your hair.

“It’s _late_ ,” you groan. “I’m _tired_.”

“You’ve made that very clear,” he grins.

You lift your head off the textbook, glare-pouting at him. Your attempts to look intimidating rarely succeed, and this is no exception. 

Kuroo can’t hold back his fond smile.

You look exhausted.

Your eyes are a little blearier than usual, shot through with red. Your hair’s a bit of a mess – not that you’ve really made an effort with it anyway – and you’ve got that dull pallor that seems to befall everyone deficient of adequate sleep.

Maybe ten forty-six in the evening was a bit late to be starting homework. And unfortunately for you, the focus for this evening is maths and chemistry.

Of course, Kuroo’s adamant that he _tried_ to get started earlier.

(He didn’t think that the two of you would end up wasting _so much_ of the afternoon just watching _Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood,_ but when he’d checked the time, he’d tried to move onto studying.

You, on the other hand, had other ideas.

“Just one more episode.”

“No,” he shook his head. “We’ve got work to do.”

“But we can’t stop _here_ ,” you whined. “I wanna know what happens.”

“We’ve got to _study_ ,” he’d replied, firm and strict and resolute.

But when you’d grabbed his arm and pouted up at him, saying “Please, Tetsu?”, his resolve toppled in on itself like a poorly constructed engineering assignment made of straws.)

“Hey,” he sighs, patting you on the back. “Let’s just try to get this chapter done tonight, okay? That’s all.”

“Okay,” you mumble.

He knows it’s a bit unfair; the chapter in question is a rather long one, with far more activities in it than the average. But he trusts you to understand what needs to be done – he wouldn’t be putting you through this if it wasn’t so relevant.

He wants you to succeed. He really does. And you both know just how hard he’s been working to help you get to where you need to be.

Time and time again, you apologise for taking up so much of his time, for asking so much of him. He always smiles, saying that it’s actually good practice for him, too – and, of course, you’re managing the volleyball team.

He insists it’s a two-way street.

Not that it matters. He knows that he’d still do this for you, even if he gets nothing out of it.

He finds it too hard to say no to you, after all.

Kuroo jumps as a solid three-rap knock rattles his door.

“Are you still up, Tetsu dear?” His grandmother’s voice sounds far too amused for his liking.

“Uh, yeah,” he swallows, getting out of his chair and opening the door.

His grandmother stands in front of him, dressed in her purple silk pyjamas.

(They’re a recent birthday present that you’d chipped in a bit of money for, even though Kuroo had told you it was fine – you didn’t need to.

You’d just smiled and told him that you wanted to say a little thank you for how kind she’d been to you.

He remembers that his heart skipped a little at your smile.)

“Goodness, Tetsu, I keep forgetting just how tall you are,” his grandmother chuckles, craning her neck to get a good look at his face.

“Maybe you’re just shrinking,” Kuroo grins.

“Don’t even joke about that, my boy,” she laughs, shaking her head. “That’s a very real possibility at my age.”

She pokes her head through the doorway, catching sight of you slouched in your chair.

“You look exhausted, dear,” she smiles, tilting her head at you.

“I _am_ ,” you whine, stretching your arms over the desk. “Your grandson is a _tyrant_.”

“Perhaps you and Kenma should stage a coup,” she suggests, eyes twinkling. “Dethrone this despot king and free yourselves from his incessant nagging.”

“I don’t nag!”

“Oh, is that so?” her smile widens. “‘Oh, don’t forget to drink this whole bottle, _Obaa-chan_. It’s important to keep your fluids up – especially at your age,’” she coos, dropping her voice an octave or so in her best attempt to replicate Kuroo’s tone. “‘Oh, _Obaa-chan_ , come take a walk with me! You’ve been sitting in front of the TV too long. Let’s get those old bones moving.’”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Kuroo grumbles, rubbing the back of his neck, “we get the picture.”

“‘ _Obaa-chan_! You shouldn’t be up this late! You don’t wanna wear yourself out!’” She continues, cracking a grin.

“Okay, okay!” Kuroo grouches, a sour look on his face. “Point taken!”

“I’m just teasing,” she grins. “Goodnight, Tetsu. And goodnight, dear! Don’t let him boss you around!”

“Yes ma’am!” You bark cheerfully.

She chuckles, shaking her head. But she says nothing more, ambling out the door.

Kuroo sighs.

If anything, he’s just glad she didn’t poke fun at him for having a _girl_ in his room. Though he’s well-aware he should be grateful for the fact that he’s trusted enough to not have his family snooping on him every five minutes.

Besides, being alone together in a room doesn’t mean anything. Even if…

He swallows roughly, forcing his mind to go blank.

No space for unsavoury thoughts here. None at all.

He shuts the door with a firm slam, turning back to you with his best poker face.

“So,” he hums, ambling back over to you and glancing at the textbook laid out on the desk. “What do you want to focus on?”

“Well, _I_ think it’s time for us to talk about Pride’s true identity—”

Kuroo tsks, shaking his head. “We’ve had enough _Brotherhood_ for one evening.”

You whine, slouching back in your chair. “Just one more episode?”

“No,” he laughs. “If we keep putting this off, we’re just going to have more to stress about later.”

“ _Fine_ ,” you sigh, sticking your tongue out at him. “You’re no fun.”

“I’m starting to think hiring you on as manager was a mistake,” he grins.

“ _Excuse_ me?” You gasp, affronted.

“You’re supposed to be responsible,” he chuckles. “You know – able to make good choices and all that.”

“I _do_ make good choices,” you glare at him. “I just hate any and everything to do with maths.”

Kuroo snorts. To be fair, he’s had the sneaking suspicion that you might be much better at chemistry if it didn’t involve so much mathematics.

“Besides,” you huff, crossing your arms, “the first years would riot.”

“You mean _Lev_ would riot.”

“I’m sure Inuoka would stick up for me,” you say. “And you don’t want to make Shibayama sad, do you?”

“I didn’t say anything about kicking you out,” Kuroo grins, raising an eyebrow at you.

“I know,” you hum. “Just making sure you’re aware.”

Kuroo rolls his eyes playfully, flicking your forehead. “Whatever.”

The two of you settle down after that, returning to your blasted enemy.

You do fairly well, all things considered. Your focus is a bit off, but you make a good effort. And, like always, you manage to understand Kuroo’s layman explanations of things.

Of course, the two of you can’t help yourself – your study is punctuated by straying conversations that last a little longer than they should (Kuroo’s a big believer in the fifteen-five-fifteen study method, but sometimes there’s simply too much to say; a mere five minutes doesn’t cover it). Sometimes you simply demand to see Inu-chan, not budging until you’d given the Akita a good pat.

But tonight, even Kuroo tires quickly. He figures it’s probably because you started so late; something he promises himself he’ll never let happen again. Although, he’s not willing to bet money on it.

“Alright, I’m gonna go get a drink,” he sighs, stretching his arms above his head as he stands up. His interlaced fingers almost brush the ceiling. “Did you want anything?”

“I’m okay, thanks,” you sigh, putting your pencil down.

You’ve got _that_ look on your face. The one you get when you’re faced with a particularly confusing equation or a concept you need a bit of time to wrap your head around. Kuroo knows it well; it’s usually soon followed by a quiet confession of worry and doubt.

“Hey,” he murmurs, reaching out a hand and ruffling your hair gently. “You’re doing better than you think you are.”

He wishes he could do _more_ for you, wishes he could kick those awful feelings out of your brain. But there’s not much more he can do than this. 

You look up at him with wide eyes. Your features look so gentle in the light of his desk lamp, the shadows soft and diffused. You look _fond_.

Kuroo tries to ignore it.

“You think so?” You pout. 

“Would I lie?” He chuckles.

You peer at him closely for a moment, leaning close.

Too close.

Close enough for him to make out the intricacies of your eye colour. Close enough that he’s sure you can feel just how hot his face has become. Close enough for his mind to wander to a place it really shouldn’t.

He stands up sharply before he’s even processed what’s going on.

“I’m, uh…” He clears his throat roughly, scratching the back of his neck with one hand. “I’m gonna go get some water.”

“Okay!” You nod, smiling sweetly at him.

He doesn’t let himself linger, rushing off to the kitchen and pouring himself a tall glass of water.

He gulps the whole thing down at breakneck speed. His punishment for such hastiness is a hiccup that lurches his whole chest. Well, at least it shifted whatever weird feeling was there before.

What time is it?

He turns to the clock on the kitchen wall.

His eyes blow wide.

Twelve thirty-six. _Oh, shit_. He ponders, for a moment, if the clock is a few hours fast.

With a little nugget of guilt in his chest, he rushes back upstairs to his bedroom.

He opens the door slowly, not wanting to disturb the house. He slips through just as quietly, turning to say something to you.

You’re lying on the desk again. But this time, your head is laid on crossed arms, your back rising and falling gently with each breath.

Kuroo’s heart feels like it might damn well shatter.

His first instinct is to pick you up and put you on his bed.

His first coherent thought is ‘ _what the fuck, dude?_ ’.

He slinks towards you and places a gentle hand on your shoulder. He flushes at the contact.

_What are you, twelve_? He chastises himself. _You’ve touched each other plenty of times before._

He immediately regrets that phrasing.

“Hey,” he murmurs, shaking your shoulder slightly. “Wake up.”

You’re motionless.

“ _Hey_ ,” Kuroo whines.

“Hm?” You croak, stirring a little.

Kuroo draws back.

You lift your head and blink at him through bleary eyes.

_Holy shit_ , he thinks. _Holy fucking shit._

“It’s past midnight,” he says, ruffling your hair on instinct. Why he made the effort to yet again make physical contact with you, he doesn’t know. It’s a terrible idea, really.

“Ew,” you frown. “ _No_.”

Kuroo shoves both his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants. There’s no risk of him doing something stupid if he does that, right?

You’re staring at your phone, your eyebrows drawn together and your lips pursed.

He knows that look.

It’s the one you always pull when he (reluctantly) calls an end to whatever you’re doing before walking you home in the evening. And he doesn’t miss how you stick a little closer to him when it’s dark, or how you always seem to glance over your shoulder at each and every peculiar sound. And he certainly doesn’t miss how you ask him to text you to let you know he’s gotten home safe. 

You don’t need to tell him that you don’t want to walk all that way in the dark.

“Do you just want to stay here tonight?” He asks. He loathes himself for the weird fuzziness that churns in his gut.

You pout at him. He’s seen that face enough times to know that it means ‘please.’

“Wait here,” he smiles.

He hurries to the laundry area, rifling through his grandmother’s pile of clean clothing. There’s no way he’s going to let you sleep in your school uniform; it can’t be comfortable, and the fabric doesn’t seem breathable.

He goes through the pile once. Twice. Three times.

Nothing. There’s nothing he can lend you for the evening.

“Shit,” he mumbles, running a hand through his hair. Surely there must be—

Oh no. Oh _no_.

He catches sight of a plain black shirt sitting atop his pile of clean clothes. His face suddenly feels very, very hot.

_It’s fine_ , he thinks. _It’s not a big deal. My heart is_ not _racing at the thought of her wearing one of my clothes_. _It’s_ not.

He grabs the shirt with a certain boyish carelessness, as if to prove to himself that he’s _not_ losing his mind.

Sure, the blurry image of you wearing one of his shirts keeps trying to barge its way to the forefront of his mind, but it’s fine. It’s _fine_. It’s just a teenage boy thing.

He stalks back to his room with the whisper of a scowl on his face. Man, he needs to go to sleep.

As he opens the door, he catches sight of you mid-stretch. Your face is screwed up like a cat’s, nose scrunched up and eyes screwed shut.

But you’re _cute_. How is that _cute_? Why is that expression so endearing?

_I’m delirious_ , he surmises. _Probably because it’s so late_.

He holds the shirt out to you with a stiff arm. “Here.”

Would you find it weird, him giving you one of his own shirts to sleep in? Would you think he’s being creepy?

You just nod as you take it from him, holding it to your chest with two hands like it’s a blanket.

Ah. So he’s overthinking it. Like an idiot.

“Did you let your family know?” He asks, trying to distract himself from his own fraying thoughts.

You nod. “I called them.”

“And they’re… fine with it?” His eyes widen slightly. Their daughter, staying over a night at a boy’s house…

“They were more angry at me for waking them up,” you pout. “But they didn’t have any problems with it.”

Kuroo’s heart swells. He’s _trusted_ – your parents don’t mind this little arrangement. He’s not quite sure _why_ he’s so proud, but he lets himself bask in it.

“Hey, Tetsu?”

“Hm?”

“Could I please have some water?” You mumble, rubbing one of your eyes with your knuckles.

He dashes out of the room a little quicker than he usually would – almost like his body had moved on instinct to fulfil your request.

By the time he gets back to his room, you’ve finished changing.

Kuroo’s certain he’s going to _explode_.

His shirt is so _big_ on you – it’s already a bit roomy on him – grazing your lower thighs and giving him the overwhelming desire to wrap his arms around you. Your eyes are half-lidded, your cheeks puffed out a little, your hair all messy and unkempt. You look so sleepy, so _cute_ , so—

He thrusts the glass of water towards you, cringing as the liquid sloshes dangerously close to the lip of the cup.

“Thank you,” you smile, your face lighting up as you take it from you.

Kuroo doesn’t fail to notice how your fingers brush against his as you do so.

God, he _really_ needs to get some sleep.

“You stay in here,” he swallows, gesturing to his room.

You blink at him for a moment before realising what he means. “Wait, really?”

He nods. “I’ll just sleep on the couch.”

“ _No_ —” You’re pouting at him, misplaced guilt shining in your eyes.

“It’s fine,” Kuroo grins, ruffling your hair on reflex. He swears he zaps his fingers. “Now, you get some sleep.

“Fine,” you mumble, glare-pouting at him. “But you’ll… you’ll pay for this.”

“Will I now?” His grin broadens.

“I will,” you nod, comically resolute. “Wait, no—no, _you_ will.”

Kuroo laughs, ruffling your hair again and reaching to—

_Woah_. Woah.

Where’d this sudden urge to kiss you on the forehead come from? That’s… weird.

He draws his hand back quickly. He can’t risk doing anything stupid.

“Now _sleep_ ,” he tuts, pointing you to the bed. “But don’t forget to drink your water.”

“I _know_ ,” you huff, turning around and scuttling towards the bed.

Kuroo turns around sharply, making a beeline for the door. If seeing you in his shirt was enough to make his brain go haywire, then seeing you in his bed…

He’s pretty sure he throws you a ‘good night’ before pulling the door to his room firmly shut, but he can’t be certain. He’s too busy taking a deep breath, trying to filter all the unsavoury and alarming thoughts out of his brain.

You’re his _friend_. He’s not supposed to want to kiss you on the forehead, to hold you in his arms. Hell, you’d probably think it was weird enough that he finds you so damn cute. And God, the thought of making you uncomfortable…

The guilt roots itself deep as he grabs himself some blankets and pillows from the laundry cupboard, dragging himself towards the couch.

He throws himself onto it face first, trying to ignore the burn running through his body. It feels like he’s on _fire_ – and that pouty, sleepy expression of yours is scorched on the back of his eyelids.

This is normal, he reasons. He’s just a normal, hormonal teenager who likes girls. And you, a dear and beloved friend, just so happens to be a girl. This is unfortunate, but it’s _fine_. It doesn’t mean anything more. Right?

You’re just _friends_. Nothing weird going on here.

Besides, it’s not his fault. _Anyone_ would’ve been endeared by what he’d seen tonight.

You’re just too damn cute.

Right?


	4. part 3

“You gotta make sure you squish it down,” Kuroo said, patting his hair.

“I know,” you laughed, on your tiptoes as you balanced yourself on one of his shoulders. You tried not to think too much about how close the two of you were, and how unnecessary it was. Measuring the heights of the rest of the team hadn’t felt this weird. Was it because you’d stood on a step ladder for the other behemoths of the team? Was it because Kuroo was kind of attractive? Hard to say. 

You really should’ve just used the step ladder. That way, you wouldn’t have to rely on your admittedly shoddy sense of balance– 

_Oh shit_. You felt yourself falling backwards, squeezing your eyes shut as you prepared for your inevitable and humiliating collision with the gym floor. 

But you didn’t fall. A pair of hands grabbed you, hoisting you up. 

You opened your eyes. 

He may have had a shit-eating grin on his face, but the look that Kuroo was giving you was undeniably fond. Although, fond in the way you might look at a puppy that was chasing its own tail. 

His hands were on your waist. You’re close, closer than you’d ever been before. You looked up at him, unable to shake the feeling that this was a bit like something out of a shoujo manga.

“You and your damn lack of balance,” he chuckled, that aggravating smile of his painting his lips. “You’ve really gotta do something about that, you know.”

“I’m well aware,” you huffed, plopping your heels back on the ground. You tried to ignore the hammering in your chest and the way you couldn’t take your eyes away from his face. You tried to stop your mind from flicking back to the day he’d been crowned captain, and how it had felt to be in his arms like that. 

You’re doing a rather shit job at it, really. So instead you half-dove for your notebook, jotting down his height. You’d already prepared all the measurements from the last assessment in order to compare them. 

“You’ve barely grown,” you mused, brows all furrowed as you looked at the notebook.

“As long as I’m still taller than Bokuto, it’s fine.”

You laughed. He’s glad for it. “Isn’t he catching up to you?” You asked, looking over your shoulder at him.

Kuroo waved a hand. “We don’t talk about that.”

You smiled, taking the opportunity to jog over to Coach Nekomata and hand him these new stats. You really needed a moment to distance yourself from him, to let yourself catch your breath. 

Those weird little feelings had been cropping up more and more. Frankly, they were annoying. You enjoyed your friendship with Kuroo. It was comfortable. It was safe. And you didn’t know what you’d do without it. Feeling… whatever it was that you were feeling could jeopardise that. So, you were determined to suppress them as aggressively as you could. 

Meanwhile, he’s trying to get the thought of just how pretty you looked in his arms out of his own head. 

✉

 _[YOU] 8:31 PM_ : if i told you you’ve shrunk a few mms since last year, what would you do?

 _[taller than bokuto (for now)] 8:31 PM_ : don’t even joke about that

 _[taller than bokuto (for now)] 8:31 PM_ : i’m a respectable 187.9cm thank you very much

 _[taller than bokuto (for now)] 8:32 PM_ : that’s basically 188. and up from, what? 186.4 cm last year?

 _[YOU] 8:32 PM_ : aw you sound just like yaku

 _[taller than bokuto (for now)] 8:32 PM_ : now that’s just uncalled for

✧ ✧ ✧

Your approach to training camp was quite similar to how a zoo animal might respond to being released into the wild. Excitement, followed by a brief spurt of anxiety, and then flitting about relentlessly as you experienced all you could. 

He hadn’t had many chances to talk to you, given how busy you both were. He was actually kind of miffed at that, much to his own surprise. But, he knew it’d only be for a week. 

You were always with the other managers, sorting out food and water, and making sure that everyone was doing okay. You had some friends on Karasuno, too, and you’d been taking the time to catch up with them. 

Somewhere along the way, you’d ended up becoming friends with Bokuto of all people. You’d been acquainted before from previous practice matches, but for some reason you’d really _clicked_ at this camp. 

And that was fine. Wonderful, even. But sometimes Kuroo really needed your help to control the kids, but he never knew where you were. 

At that moment, he needed you to whip Lev into shape. So he was doing his daily scan of the gym, hoping to catch sight of you. 

Ah. There you were.

You were peering at… something, brows furrowed and bottom lip jutted out just a little. You were sitting on the gym floor, hunched over your knees. You looked like a little gremlin. It’s kind of cute, but he’s not going to say that.

“What’re you thinking about?” Kuroo flopped down next to you, legs spread wide.

You nudged him with your foot. “Give me some space, would you?”

“Nah,” he shrugged, spreading his legs even wider. 

“You doing alright?” You murmured, slumping down to sit properly. 

“Lev’s being a little shit,” Kuroo said, “I need you to talk to him.”

“Same as always, then,” you smiled. But, you still weren’t looking at him. Your gaze was somewhere else entirely. Frowning, Kuroo did his best to follow your gaze across the busy gym. 

Were you looking at… Bokuto?

He glanced back at your face, trying not to get distracted by your eyes as he followed your gaze once more.

Yeah. There’s no way you weren’t.

Bokuto was two courts away, rapt in deep conversation with Akaashi. Kuroo knew, deep in his heart, that it was probably about something stupid. But nonetheless, _you_ were staring at him. 

“Don’t tell me you have a thing for dumbasses,” Kuroo chuckled, trying to ignore that weird little pit forming in his stomach.

“And what if I did?” You hummed, tilting your head.

“ _Really_?” Kuroo scoffed. “Bokuto’s your type?”

You used to be so easy to fluster. But you knew each other too well now. 

If he wanted to know if you really thought about Bokuto _that_ way, he’d have to be bolder. 

He wished he could ask the question more directly. He wished he could ask in a way that’d get him a definite answer.

You grinned, shaking your head. “I’m not _admiring_ him, if that’s what you’re asking." 

"Then why are you staring at him like some kind of superfan?”

“He’s just… serotonin in human form,” you shrugged. “Literally, he’s always smiling about something.” You bit your lip. “I don’t know, he just seems like someone who's… always making people… happy.”

Kuroo snorted. “You really don’t know him very well.”

“Hey, don’t be mean!” You slapped his arm gently for that one.

“I wasn’t insulting him!” Kuroo grinned, holding up his hands. “I’m just saying–”

“I thought you were _friends_.”

“We are!” Kuroo couldn’t tell if you were genuinely upset or not. “I just… not sure if his team would agree with you on that,” he grinned. “Have you seen him in a slump?”

You shrugged. “Not my problem.” A pause. “Thank God.”

Kuroo chuckled. “You know, I can put in a good word for you if you’d like.” He didn’t know why he offered. Maybe to ignore that swell in his stomach. Maybe to hear you say ‘no thanks.’

You shook your head, a smile tugging at your lips. He thanked whatever deity was looking over him. 

“Can’t I just admire someone for being a good person, Tetsu?”

He didn’t miss a beat. He quirked an eyebrow at you. “Calling me that here, huh?” A grin swept across his face before he could suppress it. “What if people hear you? They might get the wrong idea.”

You blushed at his words. You _blushed_. He didn’t know why he loved it so much when you did. 

“Shut up,” you mumbled, crossing your arms. It’s like you’re shrinking. Some part of him, unruly and foolish, wanted to wrap his arms around you.

Instead, he smiled, reaching up to ruffle your hair. “I don’t mind, at least.”

You glared at him. You didn’t know how that name had come out of your mouth. You’re still not sure if it’s okay for you to call him that. You just knew that the little smile that touched his lips whenever you used that nickname made you happy.

But it’s a small fondness; the sort that made you feel all giddy inside, but usually went unnoticed regardless. 

But nothing went unnoticed with Kuroo. No remark, no glance. He’s infuriatingly observant.

You finally understood what his opponents must feel.

His hand was still tangled in your hair. Neither of you had broken eye contact; and you’d been looking at each other for much longer than usual. There’s a voice in the back of your mind, begging you not to let your mind wander. But it’s hard, when you’re this close. When he felt barely a breath away. Your ears thrummed as you came back down to earth, the pounding of volleyballs and the chatter of far too many sweaty boys reminding you of where you are.

“Hey, Kuroo!”

A voice called out. You’re not quite sure who it belonged to. You’re too distracted by the look in his eyes.

His head whipped around, brow creased ever so slightly. But it was enough for you to know he’s annoyed. You wouldn’t let yourself wonder why.

But he’s up on his feet, and the air suddenly felt a lot cooler. And you couldn’t help but wonder, 'what was that?’

As he walked away, he couldn’t stop thinking about you. About Bokuto. About the fact he’s so _bothered_ by the mere thought that you might have a crush on his friend. You’d said you didn’t like him, right? That should’ve been enough. And yet, he couldn’t stop thinking about it. There’s something about it being someone he _knew_ that got on his nerves.

He’d convinced himself that this wasn’t love. So why did he feel like this? 

✉

 _[a respectable 187.9cm] 11:54 PM_ : i literally cannot believe that bokuto’s your type

 _[YOU] 11:54 PM_ : okay FIRST OF ALL

 _[YOU] 11:54 PM_ : i told you he’s not my type omfg i can’t believe you’re still thinking about this 

_[YOU] 11:54 PM_ : second of all

 _[YOU] 11:54 PM_ : tetsu you should be asleep 

_[YOU] 11:55 PM_ : go to sleep or there’ll be consequences 

_[a respectable 187.9cm] 11:55 PM_ : i just

 _[a respectable 187.9cm] 11:55 PM_ : i thought you’d have better taste than that, you know? 

_[YOU] 11:55 PM_ : I Am Going To Kill You

✧ ✧ ✧

“Okay,” Kuroo nodded, pen in hand. “So what exactly are you worried about?” 

You were both sat at the desk in your room, huddled over a textbook. You’d been trying to pay attention, but you just couldn’t. Your brain was too frazzled from stress. And Kuroo, as always, had picked up on that. 

You took a deep breath, straightening out your shoulders. Quite frankly, you were worried about a lot. But, you weren’t about to drop every single little anxiety you had on him all at once. 

“It’s the uni exams, right?” He asked, tilting his head at you. “Amongst other things.”

You nodded slowly. “Yeah…” 

“Did you want to do more practice exams?” He asked, reaching for his laptop. 

You shook your head. “No, I’m just…” You took another deep breath, your fists balling in the fabric of your sweatpants. “I feel like I can’t keep up with all the content we’ve been learning, and I genuinely have no idea what I’m going to do if I bomb the entrance exams.” 

Kuroo gazed at you with just the right amount of sympathy. 

“My chemistry grade’s been improving, yes, but I feel like…” You took another deep breath, trying to ground yourself. “It’s been… really, _really_ hard trying to stay on top of everything, and… and I don’t even know what I want to do with my life, so I have _no_ idea how hard I’m supposed to be working, or what I’m supposed to be focused on, and… and I’m _scared_ , and I’m worried I’m letting people down, and I’m.. I’m scared that I’m not going to do anything meaningful with my life, and–” 

Your words caught in your throat as you felt a hand on your head, smoothing over your hair. It wasn’t an unusual spiel for you; Kuroo was quite used to them. And he was getting better and better at handling them. 

“Listen,” he sighed, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “I know it’s hard for you to see your own merits. And I know that things are getting pretty overwhelming. But you’ve got to have faith in yourself.” 

You swallowed, leaning into his touch instinctively. 

“I know that’s easier said than done, but you’re smarter than you think you are,” he said, giving your arm a squeeze. “You’ve improved a _lot_ over this past year, you know? You finally know what a compound is!”

“Hey,” you whined. 

“I know, I know,” he grinned, hand now ruffling your hair. “But believe me. You can do this. I know you can.” 

You bit your lip. Oh, no. Your chest was constricting again. 

“I’m just… scared,” you mumbled, looking down at your hands. 

“I know,” he murmured, giving your arm another a light squeeze. “Let’s take this one step at a time, yeah?”

You nodded, but you didn’t lift your head back up. You kept staring at your balled up fists, trying your best to take a long, measured breath, in the hopes that doing so would help ground you. 

_Don’t think too much. Just focus on the moment. On his voice._

“Hey,” he murmured, unlooping his arm from your shoulders and instead taking your hand. You flinched at the suddenness of it, but you didn’t pull away. He brought his pen to the back of your hand, the nib tickling you as he scribbled something over your skin. 

_It’s going to be okay. You can do this_. Those words stared at you from the back of your hand, emblazoned in Kuroo’s chicken-scratch script. 

He’d always been saying this sort of stuff to you. He’d always been trying to help ground you, to bring you back down to earth. And above it all, he’d always had an unshakeable faith in you. A faith you didn’t quite feel like you deserved. But he was always _there_ , always supporting you. 

He meant more to you than you could even put into words.

“I’m sorry,” you sniffed, squeezing your eyes shut as you felt an all-too-familiar sting in them. “I didn’t mean to freak out on you, I’m–”

“No,” Kuroo shook his head, smiling at you. “Don’t do that.” 

You bit your lip. He hated it when you apologised for stuff like this. Totally unwarranted, he’d said. 

“Do you still have it?” Kuroo asked, letting go of your hand. 

You dug around in your bag, pulling out a little booklet. “This thing?” 

He grinned. “Yeah. You told me it’d be useful.” 

“It has been,” you murmured, fiddling with the corner of the booklet.

You’d been a little surprised when he’d first handed it to you a few months ago, but now it was well-worn. It was a collection of articles, each one dedicated to different types of coping strategies for all sorts of problems. Stress, anxiety, melancholy, a lack of motivation… any potential problem you could face, he’d found at least a handful of potential solutions for. 

Honestly, you weren’t sure if things would be running so smoothly if it wasn’t for him. Kuroo was the sort of person who always liked to be on top of things – ‘it gives me more time to goof off,’ he’d said. But you knew that he also wanted to do well; to see his hard work pay off, to get into a good university, and to make his family proud.

And he’d helped you stay on top of things as well. His timetables and this booklet were just one small part of that. 

As you ran your thumb over the booklet, a lump began to form in your throat. 

You really couldn’t have predicted that the two of you would get so close. And each and every day, you grew closer still. 

You’d noticed the little affections between the two of you. The way your hands would brush when he walked you home. The way you leant against one another whenever you had movie nights. They way his hand always lingered in your hair when he ruffled it. They were only little moments, nothing particularly grand. It was nothing that transgressed either of your boundaries. Everything you shared was nebulously platonic; more a testament to just how comfortable you really were with each other than to any undercurrent that ran differently to friendship. 

But you knew that some part of you wanted it to speak to something else. That frightened you.

And yet, romance didn’t cover it nicely. It felt almost disrespectful to try and think of your feelings that way. You had the suspicion that this love of yours didn’t fall neatly into either camp.

There’s so much at play – he meant so _much_ to you, and you honestly couldn’t imagine your life without him in it. Where would you be? _Who_ would you be? 

You loved Kuroo Tetsurou. Deeply. And you had for a while. 

Your love for him was somewhere in the in-between. There’s a wealth of feeling here, deep and powerful and intimidating. But you were scared of the grey. Scared of what it meant. Scared of how those feelings might express themselves. And you had _no_ idea what he was feeling. No idea if he was even on the same page. The last thing you wanted to do was to make him uncomfortable. 

So, it’s easier to call them platonic. For the sake of your friendship, if nothing else. 

✉

 _[passable at best] 11:34 PM_ : i hope you’re asleep right now

 _[passable at best] 11:34 PM_ : but don’t forget to look after yourself, okay? 

_[passable at best] 11:34 PM_ : i know you’re really stressed, but don’t forget to eat well and keep your fluids up 

_[passable at best] 11:35 PM_ : and when you’re stressed, take a deep breath 

_[passable at best] 11:35 PM_ : your brain needs the oxygen, if it’s going to run smoothly ;) 

✧ ✧ ✧

It took everything within you not to squeal at the top of your lungs as you watched that final spike from Yamamoto go flying off the hand of one of Nohebi’s blockers. 

Your kids had done it. They’d _won_. 

You’re running on pure adrenaline as you launched yourself in the air, jumping being the only way to properly express your delight. Yamamoto dashed towards you, hands held up. You high-fived him with a grin, saying something that you were sure was totally incoherent. But you just didn’t quite know how to put your overwhelming pride into words. 

Lev was next, running at you while screaming. You screamed back, standing on your tip-toes in an attempt to ruffle his hair. Oh, you had _words_ for him; but you’d wait until you’d calmed down a bit. 

There was someone in particular that you wanted to see, though. Someone– 

“Oi!” You flinched, turning around. 

Kuroo. With his arms spread wide, already anticipating you. 

You threw yourself into his embrace, and his arms found their way around your waist. He wanted nothing more than to be close to you, to share the joy and elation coursing through his veins. What he wanted most, in that moment, was to be with _you_. 

You melted into him, your face nestled in the crook of his neck. And then, he knew. 

It’s love.

It’s not love in the way it’s always been sold to him. It’s not a love that burns bright with passion and spectacle.

But it’s how he loves _you_. It’s a quiet, peaceful love, an impressionist watercolour of every shade and tone of affection. 

You looked up at him, cheeks flushed and eyes sparkling with joy. 

And he wondered, in that moment, if he should kiss you.

You’re looking up at him with such resolve, such determination that he felt like maybe, just maybe, the things he’d dreamt of might be possible.

There’s a pleasant remembrance, a deep gratitude for the fact that all this time, you’d been there. Supporting him. Like you always had.

But it wasn’t time to think about it. You’re still technically on the court, and there were _so many_ people around. He wasn’t going to put you on the spot like that. 

He merely wrapped his arms around you again, pulling you into his chest. "I can’t thank you enough, you know.”

“Me?” Your face was burning red, and you’re glad he couldn’t see that.

“Yeah,” he chuckled, resisting the urge to kiss the top of your head. “You’ve done a lot for me. Both as a manager, and as a friend.” 

Your arms were around his waist, and you squeezed him tight for just a moment. “You too.” 

He knew he should let you go. He knew that the two of you had been entwined like this for far too long to pass it off as platonic. But he didn’t want to let go. He wanted this moment to last forever. 

He only found the courage to let you go when Lev came thundering towards the two of you, arms raised above his head and elated smile on his face. Kuroo managed to release you, watching with an unabashedly fond smile as Lev gave you a highly dramatised play-by play of the game you’d just been watching. 

But you were smiling, all the way up to your eyes. And for Kuroo, part of loving you was feeling nothing but joy when he saw that look on your face. 

And he knew he would be blessed with that sight for the rest of the evening. 

By the time you’d all left the stadium, you and Yaku were in tears. The first years were flitting around, offering you both a copious amount of tissues. Both of you refused them, content on just using your shirts. 

Usually, the sight of you in tears would break his heart. But he knew these were happy tears. And he wouldn’t trade that brilliant smile that accompanied them for anything. 

You’d calmed down a bit by the time you all settled into a nearby ramen joint. The tears had stopped, replaced by nothing but high spirits. Kuroo, for one, was having the time of his life. There wasn’t much time to just let go these days; entrance exams were closer than he wanted them to be, and finals were growing more and more imminent. And that wasn’t even taking volleyball into account. 

But for now, he could lose himself in this moment; in sharing his glee with this team that he loved so much, that he’d fought alongside with everything he had. 

And you, of course. 

As he sat next to you, watching your face light up as you spoke to Kai about nothing of consequence, he knew that he was done with tip-toeing around the issue. Done with denying his feelings. He knew that he’s feeling something _on top_ of friendship. Not instead of it, but alongside it. And maybe that was the realisation he should’ve come to a while ago. 

But that didn’t matter. He knew now. He had to say something. 

He tried his best as he walked you home. But confessing was harder than he’d given it credit for. 

You were chatting away so animatedly about how _proud_ you were, your entire face lit from within by nothing but pure adoration for your kids. You even pulled out specific examples from today’s game, complimenting each person who’d been on the court. 

Seeing you like this made him so _soft_. So fond. 

And he wanted to kiss you really, really badly. 

_Say something_ , he thought to himself. _Say something, you absolute idiot_. 

“And _Lev_ ,” you breathed, a hand on his chest. “Can you believe it?” 

Kuroo chuckled, shaking his head. “I’ll be honest, I thought it’d take a bit longer for the whole teammate thing to click.” 

“I’m so _proud_ of him,” you said, shaking your head. “He’s grown so much in just one year.” 

_So have you_ , Kuroo thought to himself. 

“Will Yaku be okay?” You asked, looking up at him. Fuck, you were so pretty. 

“He should be,” Kuroo nodded. “Honestly, at least that sprain means he’s obligated to take a couple days rest.”

You grinned. “That’s true.” 

Your arm kept brushing against his, your hands _so close_ to touching. 

Why were his palms _so_ sweaty? He might’ve reached out and taken your hand if his own didn’t feel so _gross_. 

Fuck. You’ve already reached your house. 

“Well,” you sighed, rocking on your feet a little. “Thanks.” 

“For what?” He raised an eyebrow at you. 

“For tricking me into being your manager,” you laughed, moving to stand right in front of him. “It’s been fun.” 

“Geez, you don’t have to say it like it’s over.” He scoffed, too nervous to reach out and ruffle your hair like he usually would. 

“Sorry,” you grinned. “I’m just… happy.”

“Me too,” he admitted. 

You smiled at him, eyes bright and full of wonder. Were you letting the moment linger? Did you not want this to end either? Was there any possibility that you felt the same way he did? 

_Do it_ , he thought to himself. _She’s right there._ _Just… just do it._

Something in your face shifted. Just a little. But you stepped back, giving him a resolute nod. 

The moment was gone. 

“Make sure you get plenty of rest, okay?” You smiled at him. 

_Do something_ , he pleaded. 

But the adrenaline’s gone. That bright flame of courage he’d felt when you were in his arms had flickered out. And now you felt just out of reach. 

“I will,” he nodded. 

By the time you made it up to your room, you knew. 

You threw yourself on the bed, burying your head in your pillow. 

He was going to kiss you. 

You could see it in his eyes. In how he’d looked at you in his arms at the stadium. In the way he’d hesitated before dropping you home. 

You’d _wanted_ him to kiss you. You’d felt nothing but crushing disappointment when he hadn’t. 

You rolled over onto your back, staring at your ceiling for a second. You took a few deep breaths – just as that little booklet of yours instructed you to. You needed to calm down. To sort out your thoughts. 

You sat up, reaching for the photo album sitting on your bedside table. 

It was his birthday tomorrow. It’d been lost in the hub-bub of the qualifiers, but you’d been preparing this gift for a couple of months now. You just had to get the photos from today printed, and it’d be complete. 

You flicked through the last few pages, gazing over the pictures of the past few months with a strange lump in your throat. 

It hit you as you looked at his face in one photo. It’s decorated with a genuine smile as he gazed at you, sat next to him in a little booth at a ramen joint. You’re not doing anything special. Just laughing, probably at something stupid he had said. But he looked so _happy_ , and that made your heart ache in the way it only did for him. 

You couldn’t chalk your feelings up as just friendship. You had feelings for Kuroo Tetsurou, and they’re multiplicious. They’re something in-between friendship and romance, something you hadn’t given shape and form to. 

But they’re something you wanted to explore. 

✉

 _[YOU] 8:43 PM_ : hey

 _[YOU] 8:43 PM_ : i don’t think i made it clear enough today, but i’m so proud of you 

_[tetsuwu] 8:44 PM_ : yeah, the team really gave it their all 

_[YOU] 8:44 PM_ : they did! but i meant, like you. i’m proud of you

 _[tetsuwu] 8:47 PM_ : oi

 _[YOU] 8:47 PM_ : ????

 _[tetsuwu] 8:48 PM_ : what did i say about warning a guy before you say sappy stuff like that? 

_[YOU] 8:48 PM_ : look, i just wanted to let you know! and you should really be proud of yourself, you know?

 _[tetsuwu] 8:49 PM_ : just. give me a moment 

_[tetsuwu] 8:50 PM_ : also did you have to change my name back to tetsuwu?

 _[YOU] 8:50 PM_ : it’s a classic :) 

✧ ✧ ✧

Birthday mornings were always a gamble in the Kuroo household. 

Was the rest of the family going to pretend they forgot? Were they going to be standing in the corner of your room, waiting for you to wake up and scream? Were they going to be hiding in the garden as you woke up to an empty house? 

Most years he tried to wake up early to get the jump on them. But he’d permitted himself a sleep-in, just this once.

He’d been up late, after all, cursing himself out for being such a coward. The thought’s still with him when he woke up. 

He had to push it out of his mind. There was a lot to be happy about – a spot at nationals, a chance to make the Battle At The Garbage Dump actually happen, his _birthday_. He knew he shouldn’t dwell too much on you. He also had to check on Kenma; chances were he was suffering from a fever, as usual. 

He’d confess. Eventually. But first he had to actually enjoy his birthday. 

And the only way to kick that off was with a tea. 

He’s still a bit bleary from sleep as he walked into the kitchen, intent only on getting some caffeine into his body. He didn’t need to peek at the mirror to know that he looked like a damn mess. His family would chew him out for it regardless. 

So he tried to steel himself for the typical morning tirade, playful jabs that he had to be lucid enough to return. 

What he didn’t steel himself for, however, was seeing you standing in his kitchen. 

He froze. What were you doing here? Why were you speaking to his grandmother? Why did you look _so cute_ in your jumper? 

The questions flooded his mind all at once, a mental labyrinth that he couldn’t quite make his way through. 

Your arms were around his neck before he even had the chance to process it.

“Happy birthday!”

 _Oh, oh_ –

He’d been awake for barely fifteen minutes, and he had to act like this wasn’t making him melt into a puddle? His mind was back at the play-offs, his arms around your waist as you pressed your body against his. He needed to regain his composure, and desperately.

“Thanks,” he managed to mumble out, his arms hovering awkwardly above your waist. 

At that moment, he locked eyes with his grandmother. Her face was plastered with the trademark Kuroo grin, and she winked at him. 

That’s it. His composure was completely in shambles. He grabbed your shoulders and pushed you away from him, giving him the space he needed to think clearly. 

“So…” He cleared his throat, one hand pressed on his neck as if to ground himself. “What are you doing here?”

Your face fell ever so slightly, and it broke his heart. 

“Isn’t it obvious?” You frowned, tilting your head at him. “It’s your birthday. I wanted to come and say hi.” 

He locked eyes with his grandmother again. She took a sip of her tea. 

“Let’s… let’s go to my room,” he suggested, painfully aware of the fact that the flush in his cheeks had made its way to his neck. It’s not ideal, being alone with you in his room when he’s feeling like _this_. But if he was going to embarrass himself, he’d prefer to do it somewhere his grandmother couldn’t watch. 

He didn’t wait for your response. 

He turned on his heels, stalking out of the kitchen as quickly as he could. 

He’d wanted at _least_ twenty-four hours to pull himself together. At _least_. Then maybe he would’ve stood a chance while talking to you. But here you were, one of the first faces he’d seen today. How long had he been awake? Twenty minutes? 

This was, quite frankly, a disaster. 

He thundered into his room and sat himself on his bed, back a little too straight and hands balled up in his lap. 

You sat yourself down next to him after shutting his door, close enough to make him a little more nervous. You’ve got a gift bag in your hand and a look of concern painted on your face. 

“Tetsu, are you okay?” 

Did you have to use his nickname? You’d called him that plenty of times before, but now it just felt… strange. Now it made his stomach flutter in all sorts of ways.

“Yeah,” he blushed, looking away from you. “Do I seem… not okay?”

“You seem uneasy.” 

_Idiot_ , he thought to himself. Of course you’d be able to read him. And it’s not like he’s being _subtle_. 

“I’m fine,” he said, trying to replicate his usual easy smile. “Just feeling old, you know?” 

You laughed. “Sure.” 

He could feel his face burning up. And he could feel you watching him. That just made it worse. 

He didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know what he even _wanted_ to say. Blurting out a confession wasn’t the best way to go about it. But he didn’t even know how to start a conversation with you right now. 

“I, uh… I brought you something,” you said, holding out the bag. 

He took it with a nod, setting it in his lap. Okay. This was a start. At the very least, he now had something to talk to you about. 

He took a deep breath as he reached into the bag, pulling out a thick, square-shaped present. Peering into the bag, he caught sight of an envelope. 

“Read the letter later, please,” you said, your cheeks a little pink. 

He nodded. You probably got all sappy in it. If he read it now, he’d probably explode. 

“You can open the present, though,” you said, gesturing to it. 

“Right,” he mumbled, taking a second to collect himself before tearing into the wrapping.

It’s a photo album. The photo you’d slipped into the cover was one of the team, collapsed in a human pile as they beamed at the camera. 

He looked at you tentatively. You offered him a beautiful smile. 

“I hope you like it,” you said, a hint of blush to your cheeks. 

He already knew he would. 

But he wasn’t ready for the absolute flood of emotions that was stuffed between these pages. There was that time from second year, when the team had gone to a theme park. It was just after Kenma had started to bleach his hair. Kuroo, Yaku and Kai beamed up from the page, completely unaware of Yamamoto pulling a face in the background. 

There’s the day you, Kuroo and Kenma had gone to get ice cream in celebration of Kuroo’s captaincy. Kuroo’s beaming at the camera, one arm looped around Kenma’s shoulder. It’s only slightly, but Kenma’s smiling, too.

There’s a selfie from that trip to the temple, both your cheeks flushed. He couldn’t tell if it’s from the cold or from the promises you’d made that day. 

There’s photos from the New Years’ Festival you’d both attended with Yaku and Kai. You’re all dressed up in your nicest clothes, pressed together for a poorly lit selfie. 

There’s the first group photo from this year, the entire team huddled together. The taller guys had to hunch to accommodate the likes of Yaku, even if they weren’t about to say it out loud. But, half of Lev’s head still got cut off. 

And that’s just a handful of them. His heart was already overwhelmed as he flicked through countless photos of birthday celebrations, the training camp, and many other little moments he’d forgotten about. 

There’s even photos from yesterday, each member of the team grinning like idiots. 

The tears welled up before he could stop them. 

He wasn’t the sort to get sentimental. But this just got to him. Seeing every happy, joyful memory of the past two years made him feel like he was about to collapse in on himself. It filled him with a certain sense of adoration that he couldn’t hold back. 

He covered his face with his hands, bending over. 

“Hey,” you murmured, placing a hand on his back. “You alright?”

“I’m–” He choked on his words, clearing his throat. “I’m great.” 

When he finally dropped his hands and let you see his face, your heart stuttered. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes, his nose was all red, and his cheeks were flushed a deep, deep scarlet. But you didn’t have time to process it. 

His arms wrapped around you, pulling you towards him. You conceded, resting your face in the crook of his neck and wrapping your arms around his chest. He’s warm, comforting. 

“I wouldn’t be who I am today without you.”

His breath fanned your neck as he said those words. And as fuzzy as that made your mind, you knew you felt the same way. 

You genuinely couldn’t imagine who you’d be without him. He’d had such an impact on you, and you couldn’t be more _grateful_ for all the ways he’d helped you grow as a person. 

And you knew now that, it’s okay to love him in the in-between. You didn’t need to be afraid of how you felt. You could love him in all sorts of ways; in ways that were cleanly defined, and in ways that weren’t. You could love him as you needed to. As you’re able to. 

“Me neither,” you mumbled. 

He drew back, bringing one of his hands to cup your cheek. You didn’t shy away. 

He was looking at you with such _affection_ , his eyes still a little watery, still a little red. You loved this Kuroo – this big, dense softie. 

His thumb ran over your cheek gently, and you hoped your face didn’t look asflushed as it felt. 

He thought you were the most precious thing he’d ever seen. 

“Can I kiss you?” His words were soft, his voice low and gentle. 

You could feel your heart hammering in your chest, your mind abuzz with excitement, nervousness and everything in-between. 

You managed to nod. 

The smile on his face rivalled even the most beautiful sunrise you’d ever seen. 

When his lips met yours, you felt everything from elation to relief. Elation at being able to hold him like this. Relief that you could finally hold him in all the ways you wanted to. 

His lips were softer than you’d expected them to be, and his touch so gentle and hesitant that you felt like you’re about to melt. 

But there’s desperation in this kiss, a testament to all the build-up. You wanted more of him. You wanted to give him more of you. 

He pulled you into his lap gently, both hands on your waist. One of your hands was twined in his hair, the other running over his shoulder and collarbone with a feather-light touch. You’re just so glad, so grateful that you finally get to be with him like this. 

His hands moved from your waist, to your hips, to your thighs, to your shoulders. The only thought running through his brain was _you_ – how _good_ it felt to kiss you, how exhilarating it felt to hold you close to him like this with no hesitation, how it felt like he’d waited his whole life for this. For you. 

Some part of his brain thought that was oh-so-adolescent and stupid. Most of his brain didn’t care.

You pulled away, lips pink and cheeks flushed. He blinked at you, dazed and a little startled. How did your post-kissing face look so cute _and_ pretty? Why hadn’t he kissed you sooner? Why’d he deprived you both of this for so long? 

“Tetsu,” you hummed, cupping his face in your hands. 

“Hm?” 

“Your family is home.” 

“Oh,” he swallowed, a little embarrassed by how much he’d let his mind wander. “Yeah.” You both knew that his grandmother wasn’t the type to knock. 

You laughed, pressing a kiss to his nose. 

He smiled at you. A sudden swell of gratitude gripped his heart; you felt the same way as he did. You hadn’t necessarily traded those words yet, but he had a feeling that they were in that letter you’d written for him. 

But you didn’t need to talk about it right now. You could just enjoy this moment. Enjoy the fact that neither of you were holding back anymore. 

He couldn’t wait to tell Kenma–

 _Oh shit_. Kenma. 

“You alright?” You asked, brushing his fringe out of his face. 

“Huh?” He asked, blinking at you. 

“Your face went all weird,” you pouted. 

“I just remembered that I’ve gotta go check on Kenma,” he said, resting his hands on your hips. “I want to make sure he hasn’t got a fever from yesterday.” 

Oh. _Oh_. Your heart was going again. 

There was a lot you could say about Kuroo Tetsurou. And there were so many things you couldn’t put into words. You adored him. You adored him for his perspective on things, for how he always managed to bring you back down to earth. You adored him for just how much he cared, even if that was veiled by his playful deflections. You adored him for the fact that, even though he’d never admit it, he’s soft, and had a penchant for offering people all that he could give. 

And he’d given you so much. He’d been your resource to use as you pleased, and so much more. He’d held you up without complaint, and he’d done nothing but support you. He’d been one of your closest friends, if not the closest. And ever since you’d gotten to know one another, he’d been someone you’ve always felt comfortable with. In many ways, he’d been your safe place. 

Yet on top of it all, he’s a dork. He’s clever, yes, and one of the most interesting people you’d ever known. But he’s such an _idiot_ , so endearingly goofy. He always seemed to find the levity in things, even though he knew when to take things seriously. And for all his maturity, for all those wonderful things about him, he’s still just a guy. 

You wouldn’t want him any other way. 

✉

 _[whipped] 2:01 PM_ : okay but… can i call you my girlfriend now? 

_[whipped] 2:01 PM_ : am i… your boyfriend?

 _[YOU] 2:01 PM_ : tetsu we’re in the same room 

_[whipped] 2:01 PM_ : yeah but i don’t wanna say it out loud 

_[whipped] 2:02 PM_ : also kenma’s here and he’ll get uncomfortable 

_[YOU] 2:02 PM_ : sounds suspiciously like you planned this 

_[YOU] 2:02 PM_ : anyway, i thought that much was clear? 

_[whipped] 2:03 PM_ : not necessarily 

_[whipped] 2:03 PM_ : just wanted to check 

_[YOU] 2:03 PM_ : you’re such a nerd 

_[whipped] 2:03 PM_ : yeah well… i also wanted you to know that you’re the best birthday present i could’ve asked for ;)

 _[YOU] 2:03 PM_ : oh my god

 _[YOU] 2:03 PM_ : you’re so cheesy 

_[whipped] 2:04 PM_ : :)


	5. epilogue | show off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> nekoma wants proof that their beloved manager and their scheming captain are actually together. for better or worse, your boyfriend is a petty little shit.

“Oi, Tetsu.”

“Hm?” He leaned down to get his face level with yours – a little closer than it should be.

You shoved him away by his shoulder, glaring at him. “You know, you’ve been doing a terrible job at being _subtle_.”

He grinned, straightening up and ruffling your hair. “What’s wrong?”

“Are you sure it’s a good idea?” You asked, eyes flicking over to the rest of the team. The two of you were courtside as Kuroo took a quick ‘water break.’ You had a feeling that his increasingly frequent breaks were less about keeping his hydration up, and more about gazing at you with a touch too much affection. 

“What, telling them we’re together?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at you. 

“Sh!”

He chuckled, resisting the urge to poke your nose. “You think we shouldn’t tell them?” He smirked. “Ever?”

“That’s not what I meant, and you know it.” You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest. “It’s just that… you know. The gym isn’t exactly neutral ground.”

He snorted. “Neutral ground, huh?”

“You know what I _mean_ ,” you huffed.

“Can’t say I do.” 

“You’re so mean,” you whined. If you were alone, you might’ve buried your face in his chest. But, you couldn’t really do that now. 

“I’m sorry,” he grinned, ruffling your hair yet again. “But we should tell them. And _soon_.” 

You pouted at him, trying to make your eyes as endearing as you could manage. 

“Nice try,” he chuckled. “But not gonna work.” 

“Can we at _least_ tell them when the coaches are gone?” You frowned petulantly, stuffing your hands in the pockets of your jacket. “That’ll make it a tad less embarrassing.”

“Ashamed to be with me?” Kuroo grinned, raising an eyebrow at you.

“No! I just—”

“I know,” he cooed, his fingers finding their way to the your shoulders and giving them a gentle massage. You would’ve melted into that touch, had you been alone.

“What did I say about being subtle?” You glared, but made no effort to whack his arms away. 

“Gotta go,” he smirked, tossing his bottle at you before dashing for the court. You had half a mind to call after him, but you thought better of it. 

You conceded, propping yourself against the wall as you glared at your obnoxiously tall boyfriend as subtly as you could. 

Practice was over much too quickly. You’d almost wanted it to go on forever, given what you were about to do. You knew you had to tell your kids at _some_ point, but the thought was still frightening. What would they think? Would they disapprove? 

Kuroo had said it was better to tell them sooner rather than later, and you’d begrudgingly agreed. It’d be worse if you just kept putting it off, and you were sure your kids would feel like that was a betrayal. 

But the logic of it didn’t stop you from being any less nervous. 

So when everyone was packing up and the coaches had made their exit, Kuroo ambled over to you with a concerned look on his face. 

“You sure you’re okay to tell them tonight?” Kuroo asked, tilting his head at you. 

He was far too good at reading your emotions. Perceptive bastard. 

You nodded, casting your eyes to your kids. “Yeah.”

“We don’t have to tell them if you don’t want to,” he murmured, zipping up his bag. “At least, not here.” 

“It’s okay,” you smiled, trying to quell the hammering in your chest. “It’s like ripping the bandaid off, right?”

Kuroo snorted. “Really? _That’s_ what you’re going to equate our relationship to?” 

“Not our _relationship_ , but—” 

He held back a cackle as he stood up, turning to face the rest of the team. 

“Everyone!”

The other boys turned to look at him, expressions ranging from confusion to annoyance. 

“So,” Kuroo said, slinging an arm around your shoulder. You took a deep breath as you tried to look as unbothered as possible. “We have some important news for you.”

“You’ve actually become a competent captain?” Yaku snorted. 

“Great guess, but no,” Kuroo grinned, looking at you. “We… are finally together.”

“Huh?” Lev tilted his head to the side, looking between the two of you. “Together?”

“Yes,” Kuroo nodded slowly. “Together… romantically.”

“You’re dating?” Inuoka blinked, looking between the two of you.

Kuroo resisted the urge to sigh. “Yes. We’re dating.”

“No way,” Yaku shook his head. “Nuh uh. No way _you_ grew balls and asked her out.”

“Who said _I_ asked _her_ out?” Kuroo gasped, looking down at you.

“She’s too good for you,” Kenma shrugged. Some nods rippled through the rest of the team, the general consensus being one of agreement. You bit back a laugh. That, at least, made you feel a little less nervous.

Kuroo stared at him for a moment, looking between his once-trusted childhood friend and you. 

“Then how do you explain this?” Kuroo asked, gesturing between the two of you, pointing specifically to the arm wrapped around your shoulders.

“Explain what?” Lev asked, tilting his head at the two of you. 

“Well, this is… a thing couples do,” Kuroo murmured, bewilderment working its way into his expression. 

“Not necessarily,” Lev piped up. “I put my arm around her all the time!” 

“Trust me, I know,” Kuroo seethed, pulling you a little closer. 

You bit the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from smiling too widely. Kuroo had never _said_ that Lev’s affection towards you was a problem, but you had caught your boyfriend pouting in your general direction whenever the younger boy got a little bit _too_ close. 

“So… you don’t believe me at _all_?” Kuroo frowned, looking between all the faces in front of him. 

“Nuh uh.” Several of the boys shook their heads. 

“But… why would we both be standing here, telling you all that we’re dating?” Kuroo asked, trying to grasp at some logical argument. You could tell that his frustration was already growing. You, on the other hand, were having a great time. 

“You offered to pay her five thousand yen,” Yamamoto shrugged. “Only scenario that makes sense.”

“She’s right here, you know.” Kuroo jerked his head at you. 

“Did he offer to pay you, like, five thousand yen or something?” Yamamoto asked, looking you dead in the eye.

“Yes.” You were nervous – but teasing Kuroo seemed like the perfect outlet. 

Kuroo’s head whipped around to look at you, aghast.

You grinned up at him.

“Sorry,” Yaku shrugged, taking a large swig of water. “We’re not just going to believe you without proof.” 

“Oh?” Kuroo raised an eyebrow, a grin spreading across his face. “So you want proof, then?”

The team looked amongst themselves, nodding. “Yeah, actually. We do.”

“I see,” Kuroo hummed, turning to face you. You complied, a small knot of anxiety tightening in your stomach. What was he planning to do?

You caught a glimpse of Kenma’s face. Anticipatory discomfort. Oh, no. 

Kuroo’s hands came up to cup your face, as they had many times this month. But, you trusted him; he wouldn’t do anything to make you comfortable. At least, not without checking with you first. 

He leant in, his breath tickling your ear. “Can I?”

You nodded, a smile tugging at your lips. You knew the team was watching with rapt attention. And you knew that your boyfriend could be a petty little shit.

His lips met yours as he moved his hands to your waist, holding you flush against his body. Your arms found their way around his neck instinctively as you stood on your tiptoes, leaning against him for balance.

 _Oh_.

He meant business.

He hummed, parting your lips with his. Of course he wouldn’t just go for a chaste peck. But, you’d let him get away with it this time.

Your face was burning; you were barely used to him touching you like this in private, let alone in front of your entire team. But you weren’t about to stop him. Your kids said they wanted proof, after all.

You weren’t sure who started it. But someone started screeching.

You could hear Lev screaming, shouting something about ‘betrayal.’ Yamamoto was full-on hollering, the sound ringing through the gym. Was the screeching… Fukunaga, then?

“Alright, that’s enough!” Yaku bellowed, grabbing Kuroo by the collar and yanking him away from you. Kuroo cackled as he stumbled back, arms still reaching out for you.

“You are _disgusting_ ,” Yaku cawed, looking between the two of you.

“You said you wanted proof!” Kuroo snickered, hands on his knees as he keeled over.

“Yeah, proof!” Yamamoto shouted. “Not a _demonstration_.”

“You’re just jealous,” Kuroo snorted, stumbling towards you. You reached out for him, planting your hands on his shoulders.

“Wait, wait, wait,” Inuoka held up a hand, looking between the two of you with wide eyes. “How long has this been going on?”

“Yeah!” Yaku huffed, hands on his hips. “How long have you been keeping this from us?”

“None of your business,” Kuroo grinned, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his chest. You laughed, letting yourself fall against him.

“They’ve been dating for about a month,” Kenma murmured, hands dug deep in his pockets. If he felt any remorse for outing you two like that, he didn’t show it. 

“A _month_?” Various sounds of indignation rose up in a racket, and you knew that you had a _lot_ to answer for. 

“ _You_!” Yaku gasped, pointing a finger at you. “You’re complicit in this!”

“Sorry,” you giggled, slipping your arms around Kuroo’s waist. Even you had to admit that the look of absolute betrayal on the boys’ faces was pretty priceless. 

“Aren’t you happy for us?” Kuroo snorted, looking between the team. “Your beloved manager and your _captain_ —”

“Of course we are,” Kai chuckled, raising a hand. “We’re just surprised.” 

“ _I_ , for one, thought you had better taste,” Yaku grumbled, jabbing a finger at you. 

“Look, dumbass—” 

“If you’re dating him out of pity, blink twice,” Yamamoto asked, looking you straight in the eye. 

“Don’t you _dare_ ,” Kuroo huffed, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

Another round of yells from your kids, mostly consisting of ‘gross!’ and ‘get a room!’ 

You elbowed Kuroo in the stomach swiftly before he could say ‘oh, we intend to.’

As Kuroo continued to gloat about his relationship to a wailing Yamamoto, you began apologising profusely to Lev and Yaku. 

Kai, bless his heart, was doing his best to help you contain the chaos, but to no avail. 

Kenma had very decidedly kept himself out of it, instead absorbing himself in whatever game he was playing on his phone.

Poor Inuoka still looked confused, but Shibayama was so red in the face that he _had_ to be cognizant of what was going on. 

Fukunaga and Teshiro just watched on, one amused and the other bewildered. 

Somehow, after all that mayhem, you managed to calm the racket down. One by one, everyone began to make their way home. 

You personally wanted to get into the warmth of a home as soon as possible, cold as a winter night in Tokyo could be. 

As usual, you and Kuroo walked with Kenma. The only difference these days was that now you and Kuroo walked hand in hand. Kenma had been the first person to find out about your relationship, and much to your relief, it hadn’t changed how he interacted with the two of you. 

If anything, he seemed quietly grateful that it gave him an opportunity to rag on Kuroo. 

“That was childish of you,” Kenma sighed, his hands dug in his pockets as the three of you trudged down the street. 

“They were insulting my honour,” Kuroo grinned, placing a hand to his chest. The other was wrapped firmly around one of yours. 

Kenma gave him _that_ look, the one that’d make anyone crumple up and feel like a total idiot. But Kuroo was undeterred, that childish grin of his growing bigger. 

“What was I _supposed_ to do? Let them tell me that my girlfriend is too good for me?”

“Your girlfriend _is_ too good for you.”

“Thank you, Kenma,” you beamed, peeking around your boyfriend to catch a glimpse of the second year. 

“The disrespect!” Kuroo scoffed. “To think, I put so much time and effort into being a good captain, and this is–”

“Goodnight,” Kenma cut in, waving a hand at the two of you. You looked over to see that you’d arrived at his house without even noticing. Kenma scuttled towards his front door, hunched over like a little gremlin with his hands stuffed in his pockets. 

“Don’t stay up too late!” Kuroo called after him. “And make sure you eat a good dinner!”

Kenma shot him a dithering look, but Kuroo remained undeterred. 

“And don’t play video games after ten! It’s bad for your eyes!” 

Kenma said nothing as he shut his front door with a resounding ‘thud.’ 

You raised an eyebrow at your boyfriend, who turned to you with a grin. 

“He’ll thank me one day.” 

“You sure?” You smiled. 

“He may not say it,” Kuroo tsked, “but I know he’s grateful deep down.” 

You rolled your eyes at him, but he knew you didn’t mean it. He gave your hand a squeeze as he stepped forward. 

“Alright, let’s get you home,” he sighed, his breath billowing in a little cloud in front of him. 

“Wait,” you said, tugging on his hand. 

“Hm?”

“I’ve got a question.” 

“Huh?” He tilted his head at you, his nose a little red and shiny from the cold. 

“Can I come over?” You hummed, giving his hand a squeeze. 

Kuroo gazed at you for a moment, his heart thrumming in his chest. It wasn’t a strange question, or one that should’ve given him reason to pause. But he still wasn’t used to this sort of thing. To you asking to hang out with him, all of your feelings out in the open. He got to spend time with you without having to hold things so close to his chest that it hurt. You could do everything together, now; talk, laugh, tease, kiss. And somehow, that was all wrapped up in one little question.

“You just want to see my grandma,” he grinned. Sure, he felt all that sentimentality, but he wasn’t about to _say_ it. 

“Oh, of course,” you nodded. “And don’t forget the dog.” 

He looked at you, your cheeks bitten red by the cold on this early December evening, your eyes shining with a pure and wholesome joy. The warmth of your hand was tucked safely in his, your bodies pressed together as you walked down the street. There was no strange tension between you anymore. No fear that either of you might ruin this precious thing you shared. 

“I guess I can live with that.” He smiled, giving your hand a squeeze. 

He’s just happy. Content. Maybe even blissful. 

And for the second time in the past five minutes, Kuroo found himself at the mercy of his own fondness. He gazed at you, the softest of smiles on his face. 

He really was lucky to have you. 

“Don’t look at me like that,” you whined, pressing your face against his arm in an attempt to hide it. 

“Like what?”

“Like… Like…” You grasped at the words, trying to think of anything that wasn’t some form of ‘like you love me.’ You gave up pretty quickly. “Like _that_!” 

You may not have said those words, but Kuroo knew you well enough to glean what you really meant. 

“I’m your _boyfriend_!” He chuckled, leaning back and tucking an arm around your waist. “What am I _supposed_ to do?”

“I don’t know,” you whined, covering your face with your gloved hands. “It’s just… you… you’re embarrassing me!” 

“I’m sorry,” Kuroo laughed, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. God, you really were too cute. “Let’s go home.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got this idea in my head and couldn't get it out. so, i decided to just write it out! it was nice to revisit these idiots <3

**Author's Note:**

> cross-posted on other platforms. i decided to keep it in sections for ease of reading!


End file.
